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Shell and Exxon Take Dutch Government to Court Over Gas Field Party Pooper

Posted by John Donovan; 14 Feb 24

In an epic tale of corporate vs. nature, Shell and ExxonMobil, the dynamic duo of fossil fuel festivities, have decided it’s time to drag the Dutch government to arbitration court. Why, you ask? Well, they’re a tad miffed that the Netherlands dared to halt their gas-guzzling shindig at the Groningen field, a once merry-go-round of gas supply that fueled Europe’s energy binges for decades.

Let’s set the scene: Groningen, a field so bountiful that Mother Nature herself might blush, has been the life of the party since the swinging ’60s. But as with all good things, the Dutch government, in a move as buzz-killing as it was seismic, decided in 2018 that the earth-shaking consequences of gas extraction were a party foul too severe. By last year, they called last rounds, decreeing that wells be shut down faster than you can say “earthquake.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Splurges $14 Billion on a Plant That’s Practically a Comedy of Errors

Posted by John Donovan: 14 Feb 24

In a jaw-dropping display of financial gymnastics, Shell, the beloved titan of environmental stewardship (wink, wink), has officially admitted to dropping a cool $14 billion on their Beaver County ethane cracker plant. That’s right, folks—more than double their initial fairy tale estimate of $6 billion. It seems someone at Shell’s been playing a little too fast and loose with the abacus.

Shell CEO Wael Sawan, possibly while polishing his crystal ball, shared this financial marvel during a recent earnings call. Sawan, who stepped into the CEO spotlight last year, presumably without a magician’s hat, stated, “The fundamental is making sure that the $14 billion so or so of capital employed in Shell Polymers Monaca are generating the return.” Ah, the sweet sound of optimism or delusion? You decide.

As if the plot couldn’t thicken any further, Sawan confessed that the plant, which started its comedic opera of mechanical mishaps from day one, won’t be belting out its full earnings aria until the 2025-26 season. But wait, there’s more! Out of the three polyethylene trains meant to serenade us with plastics, one decided to go off the rails due to “equipment issues,” delaying the grand finale of plastic production. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Crystal Ball Predicts a Gas-tastic Future

Posted by John Donovan: 14 Feb 24

Oh, buckle up, earthlings, for a rollercoaster ride into the gas-laden utopia of 2040, brought to you by none other than Shell, the fossil fuel aficionado with a heart of… well, gas. In an earth-shattering revelation that’s sure to make your carbon footprints quiver in excitement, Shell has gazed into their crystal ball (probably powered by LNG, because why not) and declared that the world’s thirst for liquefied natural gas (LNG) is about to skyrocket by more than a whopping 50% by 2040. Why? Because apparently, switching from coal to gas is the new black, especially in China and those trendy South Asian and Southeast Asian countries hungry for economic growth. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Pennsylvania Petrochemical Plant Costs Inflate to a Jaw-Dropping $14 Billion

Posted by John Donovan: 8 Feb 24

In a plot twist that no one saw coming (except maybe everyone), Shell has admitted that its petrochemical plant is more of a money pit than a cash cow, with costs ballooning to a comically oversized $14 billion. That’s right, folks – in what can only be described as a financial facepalm, Shell has managed to overshoot its initial guesstimate by a mere 130%, proving that when it comes to budget management, they’re as reliable as a chocolate teapot. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell CEO Cries Over Biden’s LNG Timeout, Fears for Big Oil’s Fragile Confidence

Posted by John Donovan: 4 Feb 24

Oh, the horror, the absolute tragedy! Shell’s CEO, Wael Sawan, has sounded the alarm bells, folks. It seems that President Joe Biden’s audacious pause on approvals for new liquefied natural gas (LNG) export terminals is causing a bit of a kerfuffle among the oil elites. Sawan, leading the charge with a violin so small you’d need a microscope to see it, warns that this move will “erode confidence” in the sacred halls of the fossil fuel industry, that bastion of stability in our ever-changing world. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Greta Thunberg Dodges the Slammer as Judge Gives Thumbs Down to Police Shenanigans at Oil Gala Protest

Posted by John Donovan: 3 Feb 24

In a plot twist worthy of a Hollywood blockbuster, Greta Thunberg and her band of eco-warriors were given a get-out-of-jail-free card by Westminster Magistrates’ Court today. Their crime? Daring to crash the fossil fuel fiesta known as the Energy Intelligence Forum, where oil magnates clinked their champagne glasses in glee. But alas, the Met Police played their part a tad too enthusiastically, slapping on ‘unlawful’ conditions faster than you can say “climate emergency.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s CEO Sawan Laments Over US LNG Drama While Cashing in Billions

Posted by John Donovan: 3 Feb 24

In a twist that no one saw coming, Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan has spilled the tea on the latest soap opera in the LNG world, where Uncle Sam’s liquefied natural gas (LNG) sector is apparently losing its sparkle. This revelation came hot off the press during Shell’s glitzy earnings call, where Sawan played the part of a concerned corporate citizen worried about the “reliability” of American LNG, amidst a backdrop of legal tiffs and paused plant approvals. “I won’t get into the details of the legal proceedings,” he teased, leaving us all on the edge of our seats for the next episode. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Magical Mystery Tour Convinces Pennsylvania to Fork Over $1.6 Billion for Plastic Paradise

Exceeding pollution limits faster than you can say “Abracadabra,” the plant has turned Beaver County into anything but the promised land of milk and honey.

Posted by John Donovan: 3 Feb 24

Once upon a time in 2012, the wizards at Shell, known for their love affair with all things oily and plastic, waved their wands (and wallets) to enchant Pennsylvania lawmakers into giving them a fairy-tale tax break. In this spellbinding saga, Shell promised to build a kingdom of polymer—a.k.a. an “ethane cracker”—capable of churning out single-use plastics galore, in exchange for a treasure chest worth $1.6 billion in tax incentives. Because what’s more enchanting than a mountain of plastic? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Strikes It Rich in LNG Lottery While Tossing Crumbs of Greenery to the Masses

Posted by John Donovan: 3 Feb 24

Once upon a time, Shell, the oil behemoth with a soft spot for environmental exploitation, threw down a whopping $70 billion to snatch up the British gas company BG Group. This wasn’t just your average mega-corporation hoarding; no, this was Shell’s grand pivot to become a titan in the liquefied natural gas (LNG) arena. Until then, their portfolio was just your run-of-the-mill pipeline gas and, of course, our planet’s lifeblood – oil.

The big bet? LNG could be the golden ticket. Europe was giving Russian gas the cold shoulder, and for everyone else, LNG was like a trendy detox diet for their energy consumption – not quite the green smoothie of wind and solar, but hey, it was something. Shell theorized that because natural gas throws fewer tantrums than oil, we could still pat ourselves on the back for fighting climate change. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Throws Cash Fiesta for Shareholders as Profits Take a ‘Modest’ Dip

“As we enter 2024, we are continuing to simplify our organization with a focus on delivering more value with less emissions,” proclaimed Wael Sawan, Shell’s chief executive, presumably with a straight face.

Posted by John Donovan: 1 Feb 24

In the latest saga of “Billionaires at Play,” Shell, the oil behemoth with a heart of coal, has graciously announced a titanic profit of only $28.2 billion for 2023, a tear-jerking decrease from its 2022 high of $39.9 billion. Cue the violins, as this marks a somber moment in Shell’s 115-year history of environmental philanthropy.

As oil and gas prices took a nap last year, Shell’s profits decided to join them, resulting in a mere $7.3 billion in the last quarter, a figure that somehow still managed to exceed the low expectations of analysts. “As we enter 2024, we are continuing to simplify our organization with a focus on delivering more value with less emissions,” proclaimed Wael Sawan, Shell’s chief executive, presumably with a straight face. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell and BP’s Profit Hits a Bump: Oil Titans Face 40% Profit Drop

Posted by John Donovan: 28 Jan 24

In a heart-wrenching turn of events, our beloved oil giants Shell and BP are bracing for a catastrophic profit plunge – a staggering 40%, no less! Get your tissues ready, folks, because this is the kind of tragedy that could bring a tear to even a billionaire’s eye.

These paragons of the oil industry, who call London their home, are set to reveal their financial results soon. Last year, they managed to scrape together a meagre £31 billion, according to those fortune-tellers at Refinitiv. Oh, how the mighty have fallen! This is a far cry from the £55 billion bonanza they enjoyed in 2022 when energy prices shot up faster than a geyser following Russia’s little escapade in Ukraine.

Remember the good old days of 2022? When the average Brent crude price was a robust $100 (£78) per barrel? Well, fast forward to last year, and it plummeted to a mere $82. It’s almost like the universe decided these oil moguls needed a reality check. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Yannick Bolloré, Climate’s Newest Champion, Boldly Teams Up with Shell for a Greener Wallet

“B Corps should not be producing marketing and PR for the world’s biggest polluters.”

Posted by John Donovan: 24 Jan 24

Oh, the sweet, sweet irony! Here we have Yannick Bolloré, our gallant hero and CEO of the Havas Group, casually chilling on the French Riviera, all the while juggling his gold pendant and an impressive collection of wristbands that scream ‘I care about the Earth’. But wait, what’s this? His company, Havas – a tiny, almost insignificant global ad agency with mere revenues of 2.3 billion euros – has decided to buddy up with Shell, the world’s fifth-largest oil company. Talk about an unexpected plot twist! read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

A Gripping David vs. Goliath Tale – John Donovan vs Shell

SENT 21 JAN 24 BY JOHN DONOVAN TO LITTLE GEM, PRODUCERS OF MR BATES vs THE POST OFFICE

I hope this message finds you well amidst the buzz created by the “Mr. Bates vs The Post Office” dramatization. That gripping portrayal of an underdog’s battle has undoubtedly opened the floodgates for stories of similar David vs Goliath confrontations.

I’m reaching out to share a compelling, real-life narrative that could rival any fictional drama with its intense plot twists and dark undertones. I invite you to explore the saga of John Donovan vs Shell – a story that unfolds like a thrilling novel, complete with corporate espionage, legal battles, and a fight against environmental injustice. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Dodging Responsibility One Oil Spill at a Time

In the Niger Delta, where Shell’s oil operations have been as welcome as a mosquito at a BBQ…

Posted by John Donovan: 19 Jan 24

In the latest episode of ‘Shell’s Adventures in Nigeria,’ the British multinational energy giant, known for its gentle caress of the environment (cue eye roll), has announced plans to sell off its onshore Nigerian subsidiary, Shell Petroleum Development Company (SPDC). The price tag? A cool $2.4 billion (€2.2 billion). The buyers? Renaissance, a band of Nigerian explorers and an international energy group. But wait, there’s a catch – it’s still waiting for the Nigerian government’s thumbs up. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell vs. The World: A Tale of Carbon Emissions, Courtrooms, and Questionable Commitments

Posted by John Donovan: 18 Jan 24

 Shell Plc is prepping for its big courtroom comeback. They’re appealing against a Dutch court ruling that was basically a ‘please stop ruining the planet’ request. The court had the audacity to order Shell to slash its global emissions by 45% by 2030 from its 2019 levels. Shell’s reaction? “Hold my oil barrel!”

Picture this: it’s 2021, and Friends of the Earth, along with six other NGOs and a casual 17,000 other plaintiffs, successfully argue that Shell is playing fast and loose with Dutch and European human rights law. The District Court in The Hague, in a move that probably had Shell execs spitting out their morning coffee, mandates this emission cut. Shell’s response: “Let’s take this to the appeals court!” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Job Cutting Spree

Shell’s Job Cutting Spree

Posted by John Donovan: 18 Jan 24

In a move that’s less about saving the planet and more about saving pennies, Shell Plc has kicked off a spree of job cuts. And guess what? The low-carbon solutions unit is first in line! Because who needs a greener future when you can have a leaner payroll, right?

Sources spilling the beans to Bloomberg revealed that Shell is on a mission to ‘create more value through simplification and discipline.’ Translation: ‘Let’s chop jobs to boost our bottom line.’ The low-carbon business folks are getting their marching orders first, with the corporate affairs division and project and technology departments soon to join the unemployment queue. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.
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