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John Donovan

Shell’s Great Escape: Fleeing Protests with the Efficiency of a Greased Pig

As long as the oil keeps flowing and the profits keep rolling in, who cares about a few unpaid workers?

Posted by John Donovan: 24 March 2024

In a move that can only be described as “strategic retreat” (or, let’s be honest, “run for the hills”), Royal Dutch Shell has evacuated around 60 foreign staff from Iraq’s Basra Gas Company. But don’t worry, folks, Shell assures us that this sudden exodus is merely a security measure, prompted by a teensy-weensy protest over delayed pay. Because when in doubt, evacuate, right?

The fun began when workers at Basra Gas Company (BGC) decided they were tired of waiting for their paychecks to arrive. In a move that Shell probably didn’t anticipate during their morning coffee, these brave souls took to the streets to demand what’s rightfully theirs. And what did Shell do in response? They promptly packed their bags and flew their foreign staff out of the country faster than you can say “employee satisfaction.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s “Oops, We Flared Again” Excuse Raises Eyebrows and Air Quality Concerns

So, as the flames dance merrily in the night sky, let’s raise a toast to Shell and its impeccable track record of putting profits over people. Because when it comes to corporate accountability, Shell’s motto seems to be: “Oops, we flared again, but don’t worry, it’s just business as usual.”

Posted by John Donovan: 23 March 2024

In a move that surprises absolutely no one, Shell Chemicals’ facility in Deer Park has treated nearby residents to yet another dazzling display of environmental irresponsibility. But fear not, dear citizens, for Shell has a perfectly reasonable explanation for this week-long flare extravaganza—it’s all because of a drumroll power outage! Yes, apparently, even multi-billion-dollar corporations can’t escape the occasional blackout.

Residents in the vicinity of Shell’s chemical facility were graced with the sight of a flaming beacon of corporate negligence, with Shell generously informing them that they can expect this fiery spectacle to last for a delightful four to seven days. Because who needs fireworks when you have flares burning off excess chemicals, am I right? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Air Pollution Permit Countdown: Tick-Tock, Time’s Up, Big Oil!

…who needs clean air when you can have profit margins as thick as the smog hanging over Shell’s conscience?

Posted by John Donovan 23 March 2024

In a surprising turn of events that may have Shell executives sweating more than just crude oil, the Pennsylvania Dept. of Environmental Protection (DEP) has issued a stern “get your act together” notice to the Shell ethane cracker plant. Essentially, they’ve slapped Shell with a deadline and said, “You’re time is up.” Yes, you read that correctly—apparently, even government agencies have given up on proper grammar when dealing with oil giants. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Ascension of Greg Joiner to Position of Executive VP at Shell Energy

Posted by John Donovan: 23 March 2024

In a move that will surely make Mother Nature roll her eyes and shrug in resignation, Shell has proudly announced the ascension of Greg Joiner to the position of Executive Vice President at Shell Energy. Who better to lead the charge on cleaner energy solutions than an oil and gas behemoth that has spent decades contributing to the climate crisis?

Joiner’s illustrious career at Shell, spanning back to the dawn of the millennium, apparently qualifies him to spearhead the company’s efforts in decarbonization. One can only assume he’s been perfecting the art of greenwashing since his days as a Business Development Manager for Pulse Energy in Australia. Ah, the memories of Shell’s early 2000s foray into electricity and gas retailing, like a fine wine tainted with the taste of environmental degradation.

In his own words, Joiner expressed his eagerness to continue Shell’s legacy of… well, whatever they’re trying to do. “I have now been with Shell for over 30 years,” he proudly proclaimed on LinkedIn, conveniently omitting any mention of the countless oil spills, emissions, and environmental devastation that may have occurred during his tenure. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Ditches Massachusetts Wind Project Like a Bad Tinder Date, Because Who Needs Renewable Energy When You’ve Got Oil?

Posted by John Donovan: 21 March 2024

In a move as shocking as discovering water is wet, Shell has decided to say “Thank U, Next” to its 50% stake in SouthCoast Wind Energy, leaving the offshore wind project off the coast of Massachusetts faster than a college student leaving their morals at spring break. The lucky recipient of Shell’s fleeting affection? Its joint venture partner, Ocean Winds North America LLC, who probably swiped right without realizing what they were getting into. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Big Oil Plays Pretend: Phasing Out Fossil Fuels Deemed ‘Fantasy’ Amid Record Profits

Posted by John Donovan: 20 March 2024

In a dazzling display of corporate doublethink, oil moguls gathered in Houston, casually shrugging off any pretence of urgency in the face of the climate crisis. Despite John F. Kerry’s victory lap at the U.N. Climate Change Conference in Dubai, declaring a monumental shift away from fossil fuels, the lords of oil in Houston had a hearty laugh. “Missed the memo, John,” they seemed to say, before diving into their Scrooge McDuck-style money vaults. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s New Strategy: ‘Net Zero Schmet Zero,’ Because Who Needs the Planet When You’ve Got Profits?

As green activists and the Church of England Pensions Board wag their fingers in disapproval, Shell seems ready to sprint in the opposite direction of net zero, all the while shouting, “Catch us if you can!” Because in the end, who needs a habitable planet when you’ve got fat dividends, right?

Posted by John Donovan: 20 March 2024

In an almost admirable display of environmental indifference, Shell Plc is flirting with the idea of putting the brakes on its already glacial pace of carbon emissions cuts. This bombshell, which is about as surprising as finding out politicians lie, comes straight from the horse’s mouth—or rather, people whispering secrets because this info is hotter than the planet we’re roasting.

Set your calendars for Thursday, folks, because Shell is about to drop its latest masterpiece in corporate doublespeak, disguised as an update to its long-term clean energy and emissions plan. The grand architect behind this slow-motion environmental train wreck? None other than CEO Wael Sawan, who seems to believe the best way to warm shareholders’ hearts (and the Earth, coincidentally) is by pumping more money into oil and gas. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Activists to Ad Agencies: Beware of Shell’s Siren Song, Lest Ye Become Gaslighting Accomplices

Havas, the brave soul who took on the Shell media account, found itself in hot water, experiencing a backlash that could only be described as what happens when you realize you’ve accidentally helped decorate the banquet hall for the Titanic’s farewell dinner.

Posted by John Donovan: 20 March 2024

In an era where even our snacks are going green, Comms Declare, the activist group with a penchant for ruining Big Oil’s marketing dreams, has issued a stark warning to all ad agencies: pitching for Shell Energy’s creative account is like signing a deal with the devil but with less fire and more gaslighting.

Shell, known affectionately as the Olympic champion of gaslighting, has put on its best sheep’s clothing, beckoning ad agencies to help peddle its renewables and energy solutions business in Australia. But Comms Declare is calling BS, suggesting that anyone who takes the bait is essentially propping up the glossy facade of a company that’s doubling down on its oil and gas love affair. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Extinction Rebellion Throws a Block Party at Shell’s Doorstep

Posted by John Donovan 20 March 2024

In a stunning display of “not today, Satan,” climate crusaders from Extinction Rebellion decided it was high time to throw a little shindig at the access roads to Shell Pernis.

The reason for this festive blockade? Shell, in its infinite wisdom, has decided that what the world really needs right now is more oil and gas. Because, of course, the best way to handle a climate crisis is to double down on the cause. It’s a bit like trying to put out a fire by throwing gasoline on it—literally. Meanwhile, Shell’s old rigs and pipelines in the North Sea are enjoying a lovely retirement, slowly rusting away like forgotten relics of a bygone era. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Former Big Cheese Bags £95m

In an astounding turn of events that shocked no one, Shell’s ex-bigwig, Ben van Beurden (left), managed to stuff his pockets with an extra £8.9 million last year, elevating his total take from the oil giant to a modest £95 million. Who said being an eco-villain doesn’t pay well?

In a spectacle of financial gymnastics that would make even Scrooge McDuck blush, a hefty long-term bonus and a golden parachute (sorry, “severance award”) ensured that van Beurden out-earned his successor, Wael Sawan, who had to scrape by on a mere £7.9 million. One can only imagine the penny-pinching at the Sawan household.

Before passing the torch (or should we say oil lamp?) to Sawan, van Beurden amassed a fortune of £86 million, proving that oil really does grease the wheels of personal fortune. Not content with just riding off into the sunset, van Beurden stuck around as an “adviser” for six months, during which he pocketed a £5.1 million long-term bonus and a £1.4 million consolation prize for “loss of office.” Because, clearly, losing an office that pays you in millions is a loss worth compensating. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Climate Ambitions Take a Dive as It Clings to Fossil Fuels

Posted by John Donovan 20 March 2024

In a stunning display of environmental apathy that could only be outdone by a Bond villain, Shell has boldly announced, “Screw it, we’re sticking with fossil fuels,” effectively giving the middle finger to the planet.

Yes, dear readers, the energy behemoth decided that its green ambitions were just too… ambitious, scaling back its carbon reduction goal for 2030 and completely ghosting any further targets for 2035. It’s like they’re trying to win an award for “Least Effort Made by a Multinational Corporation.”

Under the visionary leadership of Wael Sawan—who apparently took the helm last year with a mission to redefine the term ‘net zero’ to mean ‘net… zero changes to our fossil fuel dependency’—Shell has rationalized its decision with the classic “but renewable energy investments aren’t happening fast enough” excuse. Meanwhile, environmental campaigners are left scratching their heads, wondering if Shell is actually just a group of oil-addicted time travelers from the 1950s. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Turning American Dreamscapes into Industrial Wastelands

Posted by John Donovan: 20 March 2024

Once upon a time, in the quaint town of Vanport, PA, Rebecca Quigley lived a simple life, her days brightened by the charming view from her wraparound deck, overlooking the serene Ohio River. Little did she know, the oil titan Shell had grand plans to transform her picturesque panorama into something straight out of a dystopian novel. Enter the “ethane cracker,” a behemoth plant designed not for cracking jokes, but for churning out tiny plastic pellets, lighting up the night sky like a low-budget version of Gotham City.

As if summoned from the depths of an oil exec’s wet dream, the plant soon began its symphony of pollution—flaring waste gases, puffing out black smoke, and diffusing an aroma that could only be described as eau de antifreeze meets syrup. Quigley, suddenly finding herself living in an industrial perfume ad, started worrying about the “minor” side effects of air pollution and potential health hazards.

But fear not, dear citizens, for the state’s Department of Environmental Protection swooped in, slapping the plant with fines over $10 million for being naughty not once, not twice, but 19 times, releasing fun stuff like volatile organic compounds and benzene into the air. Who needs clean air when you can have carcinogens, right? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Is it wise for Reuters to accept content sponsorship from Shell?

Posted by John Donovan: 9 March 24

I have always been impressed with the diligence and integrity of Reuters the news agency. That applies to everyone at Reuters with whom I have had contact in the last two decades.

I have supplied Reuters with information from Shell sources used in relation to many Reuters news articles about Shell.

Here is one such article:

Shell critic says oil major targeting his website

I have published numerous articles about organisations controversially sponsored by Shell. Reuters is now added to that list. The above Reuters feature – Sustainable Switch Climate Focus – is sponsored by Shell, the global polluter. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Grand Farewell Tour: Leaving More Than Just Memories in the Niger Delta

Posted by John Donovan: 6 Mar 24

In a move that’s as surprising as finding out water is wet, Shell is packing its bags and bidding adieu to Nigeria’s onshore oil and gas scene. But not without a parting gift: a hefty cleanup bill and a landscape that looks more like a villain’s backyard in a post-apocalyptic movie. The grand exit strategy involves handing over the keys to a consortium of five mostly local companies for a modest $2.4 billion, because, you know, why deal with the mess when you can just sell it off? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Profit Party: Dancing on Oil Barrels While the World Burns

Posted by John Donovan: 6 Mar 24

Oh, what a day to be alive! Shell, our favourite environmental villain, just threw its quarterly earnings bash, and guess what? Profits are through the ozone layer, folks! Up a whopping 42 percent to the highest in over three years, all thanks to those ever-so-gentle oil price hikes and squeezing more out of the earth like it’s an old toothpaste tube. But, hold your gasps, because the plot thickens—or should we say, the oil slickens? Despite bathing in cash, Shell somehow managed to disappoint the world yet again with its cash flow not living up to the high expectations. Who could’ve guessed? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell and Saudi Aramco in a Tug-of-War for Pavilion Energy

Posted by John Donovan: 5 March 24

Oh, what do we have here? The corporate gladiators, Shell and Saudi Aramco are sharpening their swords, ready to dive into the lavish feast of Pavilion Energy’s assets, served by Singapore’s very own Temasek. It’s a spectacle worthy of the Colosseum, as these energy behemoths get shortlisted to gobble up most of what Pavilion Energy has on offer, minus the gas pipeline business because, let’s be real, that’s just the side dish no one’s really eyeing at this banquet. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.
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