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Shell’s Flaring Fiasco: Deer Park Chemical Plant Puts on a Light Show, Community Left in the Dark

…while Shell may be busy burning off whatever toxic cocktail they’ve brewed up this time, the folks in Deer Park are left choking on the fumes, both literally and figuratively.

Posted by John Donovan: 27 March 2024

Gather ’round for another dazzling display of Shell’s exceptional commitment to environmental stewardship—or lack thereof. In a feat that could rival the best fireworks show in town, the Deer Park chemical plant has been lighting up the sky with flares since last Thursday, and guess what? The party’s just getting started!

Now, you might think that flaring during an emergency is a cause for celebration, a reassuring sign that all is well in the kingdom of fossil fuels. But hold your applause, dear citizens, because while Shell may be busy burning off whatever toxic cocktail they’ve brewed up this time, the folks in Deer Park are left choking on the fumes, both literally and figuratively.

But fear not, for Shell has graciously reassured us that there’s no reason to panic. According to them, these towering flames of environmental degradation are actually doing us a favour—after all, they’re keeping our planet safe! Because nothing says “safety first” like setting the sky ablaze and hoping for the best, am I right?

And if you’re worried about all that pesky noise, light, and smoke disrupting your daily routine, fear not! Shell promises they’re taking steps to minimize the inconvenience because clearly, their top priority is the well-being of the community—ignore the fact that they’re the ones responsible for the mess in the first place.

But wait, there’s more! Despite assurances from Shell and their trusty sidekick, County Judge Lina Hidalgo, that everything’s hunky-dory, it seems a few unanswered questions are lingering in the air, much like the acrid stench of hypocrisy. Like, for instance, what exactly is being spewed into our atmosphere, and why is this fiery spectacle expected to last longer than a season finale cliffhanger?

But hey, who needs answers when you’ve got flares lighting up the night sky, right? So let’s all sit back, relax, and enjoy the show, courtesy of Shell and their breathtaking display of corporate irresponsibility. Because when it comes to putting profits over people, nobody does it quite like Big Oil. Cheers to another day in paradise, folks—where the air is thick with pollutants, and the future is burning brighter than ever.

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