Royal Dutch Shell Plc  .com Rotating Header Image

Greenpeace

Shell Throws a Billion-Dollar Bash as the Planet Heats Up, While Greenpeace Crashes the Party

Greenpeace photo…

Posted by John Donovan: 3 Feb 24

In an epic saga that could only be described as “The Great Gatsby” meets “Mad Max,” Shell, the notorious climate party pooper, has once again danced its way into the headlines.

This time, the British behemoth announced a whopping £22.4 billion in annual profits, all while Greenpeace activists, dressed in their finest mock-Shell board member attire, threw a rager outside Shell HQ, complete with a burning sign aptly named ‘Your Future.’

Yes, dear reader, as the world simmered under record global temperatures, Shell was busy counting its coins, proving once again that while Rome burns, the emperors are having a blast. The eco-warriors, not ones to miss a beat, decided if you can’t beat them, throw a better party. So, they necked champagne, fanned wads of cash, and danced the conga around the blazing truth that Shell seems all too eager to ignore. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Greta Thunberg Dodges the Slammer as Judge Gives Thumbs Down to Police Shenanigans at Oil Gala Protest

Posted by John Donovan: 3 Feb 24

In a plot twist worthy of a Hollywood blockbuster, Greta Thunberg and her band of eco-warriors were given a get-out-of-jail-free card by Westminster Magistrates’ Court today. Their crime? Daring to crash the fossil fuel fiesta known as the Energy Intelligence Forum, where oil magnates clinked their champagne glasses in glee. But alas, the Met Police played their part a tad too enthusiastically, slapping on ‘unlawful’ conditions faster than you can say “climate emergency.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Sues Greenpeace for $2.1 Million: An Episode Straight Out of ‘Succession’

Maybe HBO should consider a spin-off: “Succession: The Shell Chronicles.” Stay tuned for the next episode, where Shell might just take legal action against Mother Nature for climate change.

Posted by John Donovan: 24 Jan 24

In the latest episode of “Real Life Imitates Succession,” Shell, the ever-so-conscientious oil giant, has decided to take a leaf out of Cousin Greg’s playbook. That’s right, folks – Shell is suing Greenpeace for a whopping $2.1 million! It seems like Shell’s boardroom, with all its drama, might give the Roy family a run for their money.

So, what’s the deal? Shell is demanding a cool million in damages, plus legal fees, because six fearless Greenpeace activists decided to have a little 13-day vacation on a moving oil platform. Talk about a high-seas adventure! But wait, there’s more – the lawsuit could skyrocket to $8.6 million if contractors decide they want a piece of the action. Shell’s generosity knows no bounds, offering to reduce the lawsuit if Greenpeace promises to stop party crashing at Shell’s oil and gas shindigs in the future. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Eco-Friendly Fairy Tale Ends in Canada: Greenpeace Waves Magic Wand

Posted by John Donovan: 18 Jan 24

Once upon a time, Shell, the oil giant known for its love affair with the environment (wink, wink), launched an ad campaign in 2020 that was like a fairy tale. They promised the Canadian public that by buying their fossil fuels, they could magically “Drive carbon neutral” thanks to carbon offsets. It’s like saying eating more cake will help you lose weight, but only if you believe hard enough!

But here comes Greenpeace Canada, the party pooper, filing a complaint with the Competition Bureau. They were like that one kid at the party who said, “But the Emperor has no clothes!” Greenpeace pointed out that Shell’s claims were as shaky as a house of cards in a tornado. The big question: Could Shell really offset all emissions from “production through to the use of the fuel”? Spoiler alert: The evidence was as solid as a ghost. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Secret Spy Saga: Like a Bad Spy Movie, But With More Oil and Less Charm

Posted 22 December 2023

Oh, the irony! Shell, the ever-so-discreet and not-at-all-nefarious oil giant has been doing its darnedest to keep a lid on some rather unflattering information. But, like a leaky old barrel of their finest crude, the details just keep seeping out, much to their chagrin and our amusement.

Enter the protagonist of our story, John Donovan, and his website royaldutchshellplc.com – Shell’s least favorite bookmark. Despite Shell’s best efforts, Donovan has been quite the busy bee, collecting a swarm of Shell-related secrets. The list of names he’s disclosed reads like a who’s who of corporate espionage, featuring the likes of James J.D. Hall (Shell’s very own top spy), Crockett Oaks III, Mike Oliveri, and Walied Shater. It’s like a spy convention, but with fewer martinis. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

British Museum Gratefully Embraces BP’s ‘Green’ Millions for Grand Makeover

Posted by John Donovan: 19 Dec 2023

In a move that screams “We’re totally in sync with the times,” the British Museum has gleefully jumped into bed with BP, the poster child for environmental mindfulness, for a modest sum of £50m. This cash injection is to fund what’s being touted as the most ambitious arts and crafts project since Michelangelo painted the Sistine Chapel ceiling.

BP, known far and wide for their green fingers and a heart for the planet, will generously fund the museum’s “masterplan.” This plan, which could be mistaken for a Bond villain’s scheme for world domination, is estimated to cost a meager £1bn. And who better to foot the bill than a company renowned for its love of Mother Earth?

In this audacious display of modernity, the museum plans to give its Bloomsbury building a facelift, because what’s more important than looking good? The museum proudly proclaims the project’s “scale, complexity, and importance,” seemingly forgetting to mention the ‘irony’ aspect. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Latest Allegations and Litigation Relating to Warring Spymasters in Shell’s Corporate Security Department 

These filings contain serious allegations that, if substantiated, could negatively affect Shell’s reputation and, consequently, its share value. 

Posted by John Donovan: 15 Dec 2023

On 13 December I supplied a senior official at Shell Centre with copies of two legal motions filed in the U.S. courts earlier this month.

Extract from my email:

Enclosed with this email, you’ll find two filings submitted earlier this month to U.S. authorities by a former U.S. Federal Agent, Mr. Walied Shater. These filings contain serious allegations that, if substantiated, could negatively affect Shell’s reputation and, consequently, its share value. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Plays the Villain Again, Slapping Greenpeace with a lawsuit

Posted by John Donovan: 30 November 2023

In an Oscar-worthy performance of environmental destruction, Shell, the notorious eco-villain, once again finds itself in the spotlight as Greenpeace activists, the caped crusaders of climate justice, stage a dramatic blockade. Picture this: a fleet of kayaks, more formidable than warships, halting the operations of Shell’s import terminal in Batangas City. It’s like a scene straight out of an eco-thriller, except the stakes are real, and the planet’s future hangs in the balance. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s High Seas High Jinks: Suing the Little Greenpeace Boats for Big Green Bucks

Posted by John Donovan: 9 November 2023

In a dazzling display of corporate might meets environmental kite-flying, Shell, the ever-so-benevolent oil monarch, has unsheathed its legal swords against the high-speed rubber ducks of the sea—Greenpeace. With a modest ask of £1.7 million in damages, Shell is practically passing around the charity hat, seeking just compensation for the audacious act of activists boarding its noble vessel, the White Marlin.

As Shell puts it, with the gravity of a Shakespearean aside, they must recover “the significant costs of responding to Greenpeace’s dangerous actions.” Yes, dear reader, let’s ponder the danger of these eco-warriors and their inflatable boats against the backdrop of an oil platform, as threatening as a feather to a tank. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Revels in Petro Profits as World Pleads for Climate Mercy

Posted by John Donovan: 2 November 2023

In a spectacle of corporate jubilation, Shell has flaunted a $6.2 billion profit bonanza, much to the horror of environmentalists and the delight of shareholders rubbing their hands in glee. As if mother nature hadn’t suffered enough, Shell has profited handsomely from the oil price bounce, a merry-go-round fueled by Opec+’s crafty production cuts and the sad ongoing soap opera of global conflicts.

This show of profits, a slight dip from last year’s staggering $9.4 billion—when oil prices soared amidst the heart-wrenching drama of Russia’s invasion of Ukraine—still paints a rosy picture for Shell’s ledger. It seems the oil barons have found their silver lining in the dark clouds of geopolitical turmoil, with the World Bank casting a doomsday prophecy of oil prices potentially skyrocketing to an eye-watering $150 a barrel. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Eco-Friendly Secrets: UK Regulator Playing ‘Hide and Seek’ with North Sea Documents

Posted by John Donovan (right): 30 October 2023

Ladies and gentlemen, gather ’round! In the latest episode of How Not To Be Transparent, the UK’s oil and gas regulator is shining bright as the star. Watch in awe as they unleash their team of lawyers in a valiant attempt to shield us all from a whopping five documents concerning the teeny-tiny environmental impact of Shell’s North Sea operations. Why, you ask? Oh, just a minor “matter of process basis”. Wink, wink. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Delayed Court Battle in South Africa – Because Who Needs Pristine Coasts Anyway?

Posted by John Donovan: 18 October 2023

Oh, the audacity of those pesky environmentalists and their legal battles! It seems that Shell’s grand plan to explore for oil and gas off South Africa’s Wild Coast has hit a little snag, but who cares about the environment when there’s money to be made, right?

The court case, which was supposed to determine whether Shell can turn a beautiful, untouched piece of the world into its personal playground, has been conveniently delayed until next year. How considerate! Ricky Stone, the lawyer for environmentalists from Greenpeace Africa and Natural Justice, revealed, “It doesn’t seem like it (hearing) will be this year and will likely be heard in the first term of 2024 only.” Because, you know, protecting the environment can wait. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell and BP Score High Marks in Greenwashing: Champions in the Art of Low-Carbon Lip Service

Posted by John Donovan 26 August 2023

Hats off to Shell and BP for being so forward-thinking! The oil giants, alongside 10 other European companies, have been examined under Greenpeace’s microscope and—wait for it—have been accused of greenwashing. 

According to the analysis, Shell and BP have gone above and beyond, generating a whopping 0.02% and 0.17% of energy from renewable sources in 2022. And to think, some people say they’re not committed to the environment.

When it comes to investments in the utopian green future, BP’s heart really swelled as it allocated a generous 97% of its investments towards fossil fuels. Shell, not to be outdone, threw 91% of its chips into the fossil fuel basket too. What do you expect? Good intentions need to be bankrolled, right?

Kuba Gogolewski from Greenpeace summed it up best: “Their already inadequate decarbonization plans are an empty shell; instead of providing desperately needed clean energy, they feed us greenwashing garbage.” Ah, music to the ears of anyone who’s tired of corporate fairytales! read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Heartwarming Concern for Children: Protecting Oil & Gas Production for the Kids

Posted by John Donovan August 12, 2023

In a truly heartwarming display of compassion, Shell’s CEO, Wael Sawan, has taken a bold stance to protect the future of children. With unwavering dedication, Sawan defended the ongoing production of oil and gas, reminding us all that sacrificing a habitable planet is a small price to pay for children’s access to abundant hydrocarbons.

Sawan, the CEO of just under a year, has deftly steered Shell back to its roots, emphasizing its “ruthless” commitment to maximizing profits while minimizing any pesky environmental concerns. The slight detour towards renewables was only a momentary lapse, as evidenced by the departure of Thomas Brostrom, who foolishly entertained the idea of a greener energy future. Clearly, Sawan understands that the only way forward is through a haze of fossil fuels. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s ‘obscene’ $5bn profits

While Europe swelters in record-breaking heat, Shell stays cool as a cucumber and defiantly plans to increase oil and gas production. It’s heartwarming to witness such dedication to contributing to the climate crisis while lining their own pockets. Truly, a match made in heaven.

Posted by John Donovan: July 27, 2023

In a stunning display of corporate restraint, British oil giant Shell reported a mere $5.1 billion in profits for the second quarter, triggering waves of gratitude and appreciation from climate activists across the globe. The figures came as a pleasant surprise, as analysts had anticipated an even higher windfall of $6 billion. Oh, Shell, you’ve truly outdone yourself!

Environmental campaigners, whose hearts are bursting with joy, condemned the profit figures as “obscene.” They simply can’t contain their delight as they watch Shell prioritize its shareholders’ happiness over the health of our planet. How thoughtful! And let’s not forget the beautiful billboard lovingly erected by Greenpeace activists outside Shell’s London headquarters, with the message “Our profit, your loss.” Such a touching sentiment! read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Celebrates Sky-High Profits While the World Burns

Greenpeace Demands Climate Accountability: Shell seems unfazed, pouring billions into the pockets of shareholders while the world burns.

POSTED BY JOHN DONOVAN JULY 22, 2023

Shell, the unapologetic polluting behemoth, is set to announce yet another round of astronomical profits, thanks to its reckless exploitation of oil and gas. With profits soaring to billions, Shell’s CEO, Wael Sawan, shamelessly dismisses environmental concerns and slashes green targets. Meanwhile, the world experiences catastrophic climate events, from scorching heatwaves to devastating floods. Greenpeace demands that Shell takes responsibility for the climate havoc it has caused and pays into the Loss and Damage fund, rather than pouring billions into shareholders’ pockets. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.
Comment Rules

  • Please show respect to the opinions of others no matter how seemingly far-fetched.
  • Abusive, foul language, and/or divisive comments may be deleted without notice.
  • Each blog member is allowed limited comments, as displayed above the comment box.
  • Comments must be limited to the number of words displayed above the comment box.
  • Please limit one comment after any comment posted per post.