Shell’s Falcon Pipeline: A Symphony of Environmental Disregard Hits Sour Note with Pennsylvania AG

Former employees spilled the beans faster than Shell spills drilling mud. One brave soul, Sean Larson, dared to speak up and got shown the door quicker than you can say “transparency.”

Posted by John Donovan: 23 April 2024

Pennsylvania’s Attorney General has had it up to here with Shell Pipeline Co.’s shenanigans. They’ve been charged not once, not twice, but a whopping 13 times with violating Pennsylvania’s Clean Streams Law. Why? Oh, just for repeatedly treating our precious environment like a trash can during the construction of their precious Falcon Pipeline.

Attorney General Michelle Henry isn’t mincing her words, folks. She’s dropping those charges faster than you can say “environmental catastrophe.” Shell apparently had a grand old time “forgetting” to mention all those pesky spills of industrial waste during their little construction project. You know, just your typical “whoopsie daisy” moments where drilling mud—yeah, the stuff they use to keep things slippery—somehow found its way into streams and wetlands. But hey, who cares about wetlands, right?

And guess what? It gets better! Our hero of the story, environmental inspector Frank Chamberlin, tried to be a good Samaritan and report these violations. But instead of a pat on the back, he got a swift kick in the behind. He and his spouse were harassed, ridiculed, and booted off the project faster than you can say “cover-up.” They even tried to downplay a 1,500-gallon spill as a measly 75 gallons. Talk about creative accounting!

But wait, there’s more! Shell’s playbook apparently includes a chapter titled “How to Make Friends and Influence People…to Screw Over the Environment.” Former employees spilled the beans faster than Shell spills drilling mud. One brave soul, Sean Larson, dared to speak up and got shown the door quicker than you can say “transparency.”

And let’s not forget our pals at Minnesota Limited LLC, the subcontractors who apparently took “drill until there’s a problem” as their motto. Because why bother doing things the right way when there’s stand-by pay to cushion the fall, right?

But fear not, dear readers, for Shell is here to save the day! They’ve graciously announced they’re “reviewing” the complaint. Oh, how noble of them. And never fear, they promise to keep cooperating with agencies. Because nothing says “responsible neighbor” like trashing the neighborhood and then pretending to be helpful.

So, let’s raise a toast to Shell, the company that’s truly mastered the art of environmental negligence. Here’s hoping they finally get their comeuppance. But hey, we won’t hold our breath. 

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