Shell CEO Threatens London Stock Exchange

Posted by John Donovan: 10 April 2024

In a move that has the London Stock Exchange quaking in its trading boots, Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan has dropped a bombshell threat: Shape up or we ship out to the Big Apple!

Sawan, not one to mince his words, has warned that if London’s stock market continues to undervalue Shell, they’re packing their bags and heading Stateside faster than you can say “oil spill.” 

Despite enjoying the swanky lifestyle in London, Sawan’s loyalty to the UK is about as solid as a house of cards in a hurricane. With dual Lebanese and Canadian citizenship, he’s got one foot out the door already. He’s sick and tired of London investors treating Shell like yesterday’s news while simultaneously picking their pockets clean with hefty taxes.

But wait, there’s more! Former Shell bigwig Ben van Beurden chimed in, backing Sawan’s play and highlighting the “major issue” of Shell’s valuation gap between London and New York. It’s like a game of Monopoly, and London is losing big time.

And if you thought the drama ended there, think again! Shell’s share price soared to an all-time high, hitting a whopping 2,860p. It’s like a rollercoaster ride, but instead of adrenaline, you get existential dread about the future of London’s financial hub.

But fear not, dear investors, for Shell has kindly given London a two-year notice period to shape up. So, buckle up, London Stock Exchange, because if you don’t improve, you’ll be bidding adieu to Britain’s most valuable listed company faster than you can say “tax evasion.”

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