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Wael Sawan

Shell’s Gas Gambit: Trading Green for Gas in the Name of Profit

Posted by John Donovan 12 July 2024

In another classic move from our favorite eco-villain, Shell has gone all-in on liquefied natural gas (LNG), trying to plug the gap left by its exit from Russia in 2022. With a series of deals, Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan is betting big on LNG, all while quietly stepping away from those pesky renewable energy projects.

Filling the Russian Void:

Shell’s new projects in the United Arab Emirates and Trinidad and Tobago, along with snapping up a hefty trading portfolio, are all part of Sawan’s master plan to boost LNG volumes by up to 20 million metric tons per year (mtpa) between 2023 and 2030. These moves help Shell recover from the 2.5 mtpa shortfall after ditching Russia’s Sakhalin LNG project, which led to a 5% dip in liquefaction volumes last year. Because nothing says resilience like swapping one geopolitical mess for another. read more

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Shell to the Rescue! Pauses Biofuel Plant, Continues Saving the World One Oil Spill at a Time

Posted by John Donovan 2 July 2024

In a move that surprised absolutely no one, Shell has decided to slam the brakes on the construction of one of Europe’s largest biofuel plants. This groundbreaking facility in Rotterdam was supposed to churn out 820,000 tonnes of biofuels a year, half of which would be sustainable aviation fuel (SAF) made from delightful waste cooking oil and animal fat. You know, the stuff that makes your fries taste great.

Airlines, who were giddy at the thought of selling “low-carbon” flights, are now left scratching their heads. But don’t worry, Shell assures us this is just a “temporary pause.” According to Huibert Vigeveno, Shell’s downstream, renewables, and energy solutions director, “Temporarily pausing on-site construction now will allow us to assess the most commercial way forward for the project.” Translation: “We’re figuring out how to make more money off this before pretending to care about the planet again.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell CEO’s Climate Love Letter: “It’s All Good” Says the Planet’s Top Polluter

Posted by John Donovan: 4 June 2024

In a twist straight out of a dystopian satire, Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan decided to back President Biden’s climate agenda with a level of enthusiasm typically reserved for used car salesmen and snake oil peddlers.

At an event hosted by the Center for Strategic and International Studies, Sawan showered praise on Biden’s bipartisan infrastructure law and Inflation Reduction Act, claiming they’re “attracting a significant amount of capital in different states, whether it’s a red or blue state.” Oh, how inclusive.

“You’re creating jobs. You’re actually starting to anchor new industries. And over time, what you will do is you will create supply chains locally that are able to satisfy the demands of many of these industries,” he gushed. “That’s all good.” Yes, because nothing screams “environmental stewardship” like a fossil fuel titan suddenly championing green jobs.

This revelation comes as a shock only to those living under a rock, considering Shell’s recent break from the broader oil industry to advocate for the IRA – a law passed solely by Democrats and opposed by every single Republican. Shell, ever the opportunist, now champions clean energy portions of the law to fend off potential GOP attacks. read more

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Shareholders Can’t Agree if Shell Should Keep Pretending to Care About the Climate or Just Admit They’re in it for the Money

Posted by John Donovan: 28 May 2024

Shell’s Climate Plan Rejected by Activist Shareholders at AGM, Because Who Needs the Planet Anyway?

Shell plc’s annual general meeting (AGM) turned into a circus of protests and shareholder squabbling, with a climate resolution from activist group Follow This getting shot down in flames. The resolution, supported by 27 investors managing around $4 trillion (chump change for Shell), aimed to align Shell’s medium-term carbon reduction targets with the Paris Agreement. Only 18.6% of shareholders gave a damn, down from last year’s whopping 20.2%.

Shell’s “New and Improved” Strategy

Meanwhile, Shell’s board’s half-baked climate strategy received a resounding 78.2% thumbs up from shareholders. This master plan rolled out in March, sets a groundbreaking goal of a 15-20% reduction in the net carbon intensity of energy products by 2030. Never mind that it’s a step back from the previous 20% target and completely ditches the 2035 goal. Shell’s CEO, Wael Sawan, assured everyone that this plan is all about keeping profits high, mostly from oil and gas, because, you know, gas demand is booming, and who can predict the future of energy transition, right? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell: Masters of Environmental Destruction, Not So Keen on New York Relisting Right Now

Posted 2 May 2024 by John Donovan

In a stunning display of corporate benevolence, Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan announced that the oil behemoth is graciously not considering relisting in New York at the moment. How thoughtful! Instead, they’re laser-focused on buying back shares, because apparently, that’s what the world needs more of—Shell shares.

Sawan, in a call with analysts, outlined Shell’s noble mission to bridge the valuation gap with its U.S. rivals. Because, you know, when you’re already swimming in oil money, why not aim for even more obscene profits? “We will always have something like a listing or other elements under review,” Sawan remarked, as if to say, “We’re always on the lookout for new ways to exploit the planet.”

And just in case you were wondering, Shell’s shares are currently trading below “fair market value,” according to Sawan. Well, gosh darn it, we can’t have that, can we? Because when you’re a ruthless polluter, it’s crucial that your stock price reflects your true worth as a destroyer of ecosystems. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Desperate Dash to Ditch London: An Epic Solution to Their Share Woes?

Posted by John Donovan: 21 April 2024

In a move that screams “What the hell are we even doing anymore?”, Shell, the grand poobah of the London Stock Exchange, is flirting with the idea of dumping the UK for a shot at American glory. But will this desperate shuffle truly be the panacea for their valuation nightmares? Spoiler alert: probably not.

Former Shell bigwig Ben van Beurden seems to think so, eloquently describing London’s valuation of Shell as being on par with a discount bin at a dollar store. Current head honcho Wael Sawan chimes in, echoing the sentiment with all the finesse of a bull in a china shop, claiming they’ve got “a location that clearly seems to be undervalued” and they’re ready to roll the dice on “all options. All options.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s London Departure: The Ultimate “What the Frack” Moment

Posted by John Donovan: 14 April 2024

In a stunning twist, Shell, Britain’s oil giant turned Wall Street wannabe, is eyeing a breakup with London. What’s the fuss? Well, according to CEO Wael Sawan, London’s cramping Shell’s style. But is this really about undervaluation or just a ploy to pump up the share price?

Sawan’s singing the same old tune: London’s dragging Shell down. With taxes, politics, and capital woes, it’s like the city’s throwing a share price pity party. “I have a location that clearly seems to be undervalued,” he moans to Bloomberg. Cue the violins. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell CEO Threatens London Stock Exchange

Posted by John Donovan: 10 April 2024

In a move that has the London Stock Exchange quaking in its trading boots, Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan has dropped a bombshell threat: Shape up or we ship out to the Big Apple!

Sawan, not one to mince his words, has warned that if London’s stock market continues to undervalue Shell, they’re packing their bags and heading Stateside faster than you can say “oil spill.” 

Despite enjoying the swanky lifestyle in London, Sawan’s loyalty to the UK is about as solid as a house of cards in a hurricane. With dual Lebanese and Canadian citizenship, he’s got one foot out the door already. He’s sick and tired of London investors treating Shell like yesterday’s news while simultaneously picking their pockets clean with hefty taxes. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Boss Bags £8m: “Let Them Eat Carbon Intensity Reductions”

Posted by John Donovan 8 April 2024

In a move that has charity workers choking on their avocado toast, Shell’s new top dog, Wael Sawan, has snagged a staggering £8 million in his first year at the helm, leaving many wondering if he’s moonlighting as a magician pulling money out of thin air.

While most folks are counting pennies at the pump, Sawan is raking in the cash like it’s going out of style, leaving pressure groups frothing at the mouth faster than you can say “climate crisis.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Greenpeace Lawsuit Mocked by Celebrities: “Seriously, Shell? What the Hell?”

Moreover, the letter condemns Shell’s recent strategic shift back toward increasing oil and gas production, deriding it as a profit-driven move that spells disaster for the planet.

Posted by John Donovan 1st April 2024

In a scathing open letter, a coalition of Hollywood A-listers led by Emma Thompson, Stephen Fry, and Benedict Cumberbatch have slammed Shell for its “callous and vindictive” legal crusade against Greenpeace. The letter, signed by a slew of prominent figures including Greta Thunberg and supported by environmental groups like Extinction Rebellion, lambasts Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan for orchestrating “one of the biggest attacks on Greenpeace’s right to protest in the organisation’s 53-year history.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Climate Targets: A Masterclass in Greenwashing and Greed

Shell’s priorities are crystal clear: profits over people, greed over green.

Posted by John Donovan 28 March 2024

Hold onto your hats, folks, because it seems like Shell’s climate targets just got a facelift—and boy, is it a sight to behold. In a move that can only be described as a slap in the face to environmental progress, the UK’s favourite oil and gas giant has decided to water down its commitments to cutting carbon emissions, all while maintaining its oh-so-noble pledge for net zero by 2050. How commendable!

In a stunning display of corporate doublespeak, Shell revealed its latest energy transition update, proudly announcing that it had diluted key climate targets, including the ever-so-crucial “net carbon intensity.” Because why bother actually reducing emissions when you can just tweak the numbers to make it look like you’re doing something, am I right? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Ascension of Greg Joiner to Position of Executive VP at Shell Energy

Posted by John Donovan: 23 March 2024

In a move that will surely make Mother Nature roll her eyes and shrug in resignation, Shell has proudly announced the ascension of Greg Joiner to the position of Executive Vice President at Shell Energy. Who better to lead the charge on cleaner energy solutions than an oil and gas behemoth that has spent decades contributing to the climate crisis?

Joiner’s illustrious career at Shell, spanning back to the dawn of the millennium, apparently qualifies him to spearhead the company’s efforts in decarbonization. One can only assume he’s been perfecting the art of greenwashing since his days as a Business Development Manager for Pulse Energy in Australia. Ah, the memories of Shell’s early 2000s foray into electricity and gas retailing, like a fine wine tainted with the taste of environmental degradation.

In his own words, Joiner expressed his eagerness to continue Shell’s legacy of… well, whatever they’re trying to do. “I have now been with Shell for over 30 years,” he proudly proclaimed on LinkedIn, conveniently omitting any mention of the countless oil spills, emissions, and environmental devastation that may have occurred during his tenure. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Big Oil Plays Pretend: Phasing Out Fossil Fuels Deemed ‘Fantasy’ Amid Record Profits

Posted by John Donovan: 20 March 2024

In a dazzling display of corporate doublethink, oil moguls gathered in Houston, casually shrugging off any pretence of urgency in the face of the climate crisis. Despite John F. Kerry’s victory lap at the U.N. Climate Change Conference in Dubai, declaring a monumental shift away from fossil fuels, the lords of oil in Houston had a hearty laugh. “Missed the memo, John,” they seemed to say, before diving into their Scrooge McDuck-style money vaults. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s New Strategy: ‘Net Zero Schmet Zero,’ Because Who Needs the Planet When You’ve Got Profits?

As green activists and the Church of England Pensions Board wag their fingers in disapproval, Shell seems ready to sprint in the opposite direction of net zero, all the while shouting, “Catch us if you can!” Because in the end, who needs a habitable planet when you’ve got fat dividends, right?

Posted by John Donovan: 20 March 2024

In an almost admirable display of environmental indifference, Shell Plc is flirting with the idea of putting the brakes on its already glacial pace of carbon emissions cuts. This bombshell, which is about as surprising as finding out politicians lie, comes straight from the horse’s mouth—or rather, people whispering secrets because this info is hotter than the planet we’re roasting.

Set your calendars for Thursday, folks, because Shell is about to drop its latest masterpiece in corporate doublespeak, disguised as an update to its long-term clean energy and emissions plan. The grand architect behind this slow-motion environmental train wreck? None other than CEO Wael Sawan, who seems to believe the best way to warm shareholders’ hearts (and the Earth, coincidentally) is by pumping more money into oil and gas. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Former Big Cheese Bags £95m

In an astounding turn of events that shocked no one, Shell’s ex-bigwig, Ben van Beurden (left), managed to stuff his pockets with an extra £8.9 million last year, elevating his total take from the oil giant to a modest £95 million. Who said being an eco-villain doesn’t pay well?

In a spectacle of financial gymnastics that would make even Scrooge McDuck blush, a hefty long-term bonus and a golden parachute (sorry, “severance award”) ensured that van Beurden out-earned his successor, Wael Sawan, who had to scrape by on a mere £7.9 million. One can only imagine the penny-pinching at the Sawan household.

Before passing the torch (or should we say oil lamp?) to Sawan, van Beurden amassed a fortune of £86 million, proving that oil really does grease the wheels of personal fortune. Not content with just riding off into the sunset, van Beurden stuck around as an “adviser” for six months, during which he pocketed a £5.1 million long-term bonus and a £1.4 million consolation prize for “loss of office.” Because, clearly, losing an office that pays you in millions is a loss worth compensating. read more

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Shell’s Climate Ambitions Take a Dive as It Clings to Fossil Fuels

Posted by John Donovan 20 March 2024

In a stunning display of environmental apathy that could only be outdone by a Bond villain, Shell has boldly announced, “Screw it, we’re sticking with fossil fuels,” effectively giving the middle finger to the planet.

Yes, dear readers, the energy behemoth decided that its green ambitions were just too… ambitious, scaling back its carbon reduction goal for 2030 and completely ghosting any further targets for 2035. It’s like they’re trying to win an award for “Least Effort Made by a Multinational Corporation.”

Under the visionary leadership of Wael Sawan—who apparently took the helm last year with a mission to redefine the term ‘net zero’ to mean ‘net… zero changes to our fossil fuel dependency’—Shell has rationalized its decision with the classic “but renewable energy investments aren’t happening fast enough” excuse. Meanwhile, environmental campaigners are left scratching their heads, wondering if Shell is actually just a group of oil-addicted time travelers from the 1950s. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.