Royal Dutch Shell Plc  .com Rotating Header Image

Greenwashing

Shell’s Boss Bags £8m: “Let Them Eat Carbon Intensity Reductions”

Posted by John Donovan 8 April 2024

In a move that has charity workers choking on their avocado toast, Shell’s new top dog, Wael Sawan, has snagged a staggering £8 million in his first year at the helm, leaving many wondering if he’s moonlighting as a magician pulling money out of thin air.

While most folks are counting pennies at the pump, Sawan is raking in the cash like it’s going out of style, leaving pressure groups frothing at the mouth faster than you can say “climate crisis.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Hilarious Defence: “Reducing Emissions Hinders Our Quest to Destroy the Planet!”

“…a move that left environmentalists scratching their heads and laughing hysterically…”: “And the punchline? We’re all the ones left laughing – or crying – as the world burns.”

Posted by John Donovan 2 April 2024

In a stunning display of corporate audacity, Shell has taken to a Dutch court to argue that reducing greenhouse gas emissions would somehow hinder the noble cause of climate change. Because who needs a habitable planet when you can have record profits, am I right?

In a move that left environmentalists scratching their heads and laughing hysterically, a lower Dutch court had the audacity to order Shell to cut its planet-warming carbon emissions by a measly 45 percent by 2030. Shocking, I know. But fear not, for Shell is here to save the day with its ingenious argument: “This case has no legal basis.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Oil’s Climate Goals: A Masterclass in Greenwashing or Just a Load of Bull?

Posted by John Donovan 2 April 2024

In a move that could only be described as “bold,” Shell Oil has graciously gifted the world with its latest climate strategy, dubbed the “Shell Energy Transition Strategy 2024.” Oh, how we’ve been eagerly awaiting this gem from the fine folks who brought you oil spills and environmental devastation!

According to this masterpiece of corporate spin, Shell has decided to make a few tweaks to its climate goals. You know, nothing major. Just a slight downgrade of its 2030 target from a 20% reduction in net carbon intensity to a dazzling 15-20%. And who needs a target for 2035 anyway? Certainly not a titan of the fossil fuel industry like Shell. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Faces Hague Climate Case: Another Masterclass in Hypocrisy and Legal Gymnastics

…grab your popcorn and get ready to witness Shell and six environmental and social organizations duke it out in court, led by none other than Milieudefensie (aka Friends of the Earth Netherlands) and Greenpeace Netherlands.

Posted by John Donovan 30 March 2024

Look who’s back in court again. That’s right, folks, it’s none other than Shell PLC, the poster child for environmental destruction and corporate greed. Next Tuesday, Shell’s appeal over its laughable attempt to shirk responsibility for reducing CO2 emissions comes to court in The Hague, and it promises to be a spectacle worthy of the big screen.

In a move that surprises absolutely no one, the oil supermajor is challenging a 2021 court decision that dared to order it to cut emissions under international climate agreements. Because, when it comes to saving the planet, Shell would rather stick its head in the sand and pretend like nothing’s wrong. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Climate Targets: A Masterclass in Greenwashing and Greed

Shell’s priorities are crystal clear: profits over people, greed over green.

Posted by John Donovan 28 March 2024

Hold onto your hats, folks, because it seems like Shell’s climate targets just got a facelift—and boy, is it a sight to behold. In a move that can only be described as a slap in the face to environmental progress, the UK’s favourite oil and gas giant has decided to water down its commitments to cutting carbon emissions, all while maintaining its oh-so-noble pledge for net zero by 2050. How commendable!

In a stunning display of corporate doublespeak, Shell revealed its latest energy transition update, proudly announcing that it had diluted key climate targets, including the ever-so-crucial “net carbon intensity.” Because why bother actually reducing emissions when you can just tweak the numbers to make it look like you’re doing something, am I right? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell CEO Laments: “How Dare You Sue Us for Ruining the Planet!”

That’s right, folks—while the rest of the world is desperately trying to curb emissions, Shell is busy backpedaling on its promises faster than you can say “hypocrisy.”

Posted 24 March 2024 by John Donovan

In a jaw-dropping display of corporate entitlement, Frans Everts, the CEO of Shell Netherlands, took to the airwaves to bemoan the audacity of environmental organizations daring to sue companies like Shell. Because clearly, holding polluting behemoths accountable for their role in climate catastrophe is just plain unfair, right?

In a riveting performance on TV program WNL Op Zondag, Everts cried foul, claiming that climate lawsuits were nothing short of economic sabotage. “It does not solve the problems,” he lamented, conveniently forgetting that maybe—just maybe—stopping the relentless pollution might actually, you know, solve a few problems. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Ascension of Greg Joiner to Position of Executive VP at Shell Energy

Posted by John Donovan: 23 March 2024

In a move that will surely make Mother Nature roll her eyes and shrug in resignation, Shell has proudly announced the ascension of Greg Joiner to the position of Executive Vice President at Shell Energy. Who better to lead the charge on cleaner energy solutions than an oil and gas behemoth that has spent decades contributing to the climate crisis?

Joiner’s illustrious career at Shell, spanning back to the dawn of the millennium, apparently qualifies him to spearhead the company’s efforts in decarbonization. One can only assume he’s been perfecting the art of greenwashing since his days as a Business Development Manager for Pulse Energy in Australia. Ah, the memories of Shell’s early 2000s foray into electricity and gas retailing, like a fine wine tainted with the taste of environmental degradation.

In his own words, Joiner expressed his eagerness to continue Shell’s legacy of… well, whatever they’re trying to do. “I have now been with Shell for over 30 years,” he proudly proclaimed on LinkedIn, conveniently omitting any mention of the countless oil spills, emissions, and environmental devastation that may have occurred during his tenure. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Big Oil Plays Fairy Godmother to Environmental NGOs: A Twisted Tale of Greenwashing

Posted by John Donovan: 4 March 24

In the most bewildering plot twist since Darth Vader declared paternity, it turns out the big, bad oil giants are the puppeteers of some of our favourite environmental guardians. That’s right, folks! Royal Dutch Shell, the fairy godmother of the environmental realm, waved its magic wand (or, more accurately, its hefty chequebook) and helped birth the World Wildlife Fund International. And just when you thought this fairy tale couldn’t get any weirder, Shell’s former president, John Loudon, moonlighted as the WWF’s president for a spell, bringing a whole new meaning to “keeping it in the family.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Environmental Armageddon In Nigeria

And just when you thought it couldn’t get any more “WTF,” SOMO drops the bombshell that Shell plans to stick around like a bad smell, financially entangled with the new owners.

Posted by John Donovan: 4 March 2024

In the latest episode of “How to Escape Your Mess Like a Pro,” Shell has decided it’s time to pull the ultimate Houdini act in Nigeria. You won’t believe this, folks, but Shell is trying to vanish from Nigeria faster than you can say “environmental catastrophe,” leaving behind nothing but a cloud of smoke, polluted lands, and bewildered faces. The Centre for Research on Multinational Corporations (SOMO) isn’t amused and insists that Shell shouldn’t be allowed to pull off this disappearing act until they’ve cleaned up the monumental mess they’ve made. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Latest Magic Trick: A ‘Climate Tech’ Mirage With an Oil-Stained Rabbit

Posted by John Donovan: 26 Feb 24

Well, buckle up, eco-warriors and climate change aficionados, for the latest episode of “How to Paint Your Carbon Footprint Green,” starring none other than Shell, the behemoth of black gold, in its newest role as a green wizard! In a dazzling display of environmental sleight of hand, Shell has pulled a rabbit out of its oily hat with the launch of Onward, a ‘climate tech’ startup. Brace yourselves for a journey into the future of clean energy, as envisioned by the very architects of our current fossil-fueled predicament. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Big Oil’s Profit Party: Dancing on the Graves of Global Crisis

…let’s face it, entrusting the fate of our planet and our pockets to these profit-obsessed behemoths is like asking a fox to guard the henhouse

Posted by John Donovan: 19 Feb 24

Ladies and gents, fasten your seatbelts for a ride on the Greed Express, hosted by none other than the world’s oil oligarchs, those darlings of disaster, who’ve been making it rain with profits while the world burns (literally and metaphorically). In the blue corner, weighing in with more dollars than decency, are the heavyweights of hydrocarbons: BP, Shell, Chevron, ExxonMobil, and TotalEnergies. Together, these titans of turmoil have bagged a cool $281 billion in profits since Russia decided to play war games in Ukraine. That’s billion, with a “B,” folks. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Caught in a Green Masquerade, Claims “We’re Totally Eco-Friendly, Trust Us!”

Posted by John Donovan: 16 Feb 24

In a shocking turn of events, Shell, the global beacon of environmental responsibility (pause for eye-roll), finds itself at the centre of what can only be described as a greenwashing scandal so brazen it could make an oil slick blush.

On the first of February, 2023, the heroes at Global Witness, an NGO with apparently nothing better to do than save the planet, lobbed a “groundbreaking greenwashing complaint” into the lap of the SEC’s Climate and ESG Task Force. Their mission? To beg the question: Is Shell’s so-called investment in renewables as genuine as a three-dollar bill?

Global Witness dares to suggest that Shell might be pulling a fast one on its investors by inflating its green credentials. You see, Shell has this fancy-sounding “Renewables and Energy Solutions” (RES) segment that includes, among other things, their forays into hydrogen, nature, and whatever “integrated power activities” are supposed to be. Sounds impressive, right? Well, hold your carbon offsets, because Global Witness is calling BS.

According to these party poopers, Shell’s RES segment is about as “renewable” as a coal mine. They claim a “significant portion” of Shell’s spending on RES is actually funnelled into marketing and trading “natural gas” and gas-generated power. And here’s the kicker: they argue that gas, contrary to Shell’s insinuations, is neither renewable nor a solution to our energy woes. I mean, who knew? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Dutch Pension Fund Dumps Oil Stocks, including Shell, Like Hot Potatoes

Even the Church of England Pensions Board, known more for its hymns than its hardline stance on hydrocarbons, had already ghosted Shell over its “climate stance” last year.

Posted by John Donovan: 8 Feb 24

In a move that’s as shocking as finding out water is wet, a Dutch pension fund, PFZW, has finally decided that maybe, just maybe, holding onto stocks in oil and gas behemoths like Shell, BP, and TotalEnergies isn’t the greenest idea they’ve had. So, they’ve ditched their shares in 310 oil and gas companies, a divestment spree worth around €2.8 billion, because – surprise! – these companies are about as speedy as a snail on sedatives when it comes to cutting emissions. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Magical Makeover: Introducing “Onward,” The Climate Tech Venture with a Side of Irony

It’s like watching a villain in a movie trying to convince the world they’ve turned over a new leaf, all while planning their next scheme.

Posted by John Donovan: 8 Feb 24

In a world where branding can apparently solve everything, including the pesky little issue of climate change, Shell has pulled a rabbit out of its hat with the launch of its rebranded climate tech venture, Onward. Yes, folks, the same Shell known for its heartfelt dedication to fossil fuels and making a mint while the planet burns, is now donning the cape of a climate saviour. 

Onward, previously masquerading under the incognito name Studio X, aims to dazzle us with the promise of cutting-edge technologies across the energy sector. Because nothing says “We care about the environment” like a company that’s been a key player in getting us into this mess in the first place. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Throws a Billion-Dollar Bash as the Planet Heats Up, While Greenpeace Crashes the Party

Greenpeace photo…

Posted by John Donovan: 3 Feb 24

In an epic saga that could only be described as “The Great Gatsby” meets “Mad Max,” Shell, the notorious climate party pooper, has once again danced its way into the headlines.

This time, the British behemoth announced a whopping £22.4 billion in annual profits, all while Greenpeace activists, dressed in their finest mock-Shell board member attire, threw a rager outside Shell HQ, complete with a burning sign aptly named ‘Your Future.’

Yes, dear reader, as the world simmered under record global temperatures, Shell was busy counting its coins, proving once again that while Rome burns, the emperors are having a blast. The eco-warriors, not ones to miss a beat, decided if you can’t beat them, throw a better party. So, they necked champagne, fanned wads of cash, and danced the conga around the blazing truth that Shell seems all too eager to ignore. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Greta Thunberg Dodges the Slammer as Judge Gives Thumbs Down to Police Shenanigans at Oil Gala Protest

Posted by John Donovan: 3 Feb 24

In a plot twist worthy of a Hollywood blockbuster, Greta Thunberg and her band of eco-warriors were given a get-out-of-jail-free card by Westminster Magistrates’ Court today. Their crime? Daring to crash the fossil fuel fiesta known as the Energy Intelligence Forum, where oil magnates clinked their champagne glasses in glee. But alas, the Met Police played their part a tad too enthusiastically, slapping on ‘unlawful’ conditions faster than you can say “climate emergency.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.