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Shell to the Rescue! Pauses Biofuel Plant, Continues Saving the World One Oil Spill at a Time

Jul 2nd, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan 2 July 2024

In a move that surprised absolutely no one, Shell has decided to slam the brakes on the construction of one of Europe’s largest biofuel plants. This groundbreaking facility in Rotterdam was supposed to churn out 820,000 tonnes of biofuels a year, half of which would be sustainable aviation fuel (SAF) made from delightful waste cooking oil and animal fat. You know, the stuff that makes your fries taste great.

Airlines, who were giddy at the thought of selling “low-carbon” flights, are now left scratching their heads. But don’t worry, Shell assures us this is just a “temporary pause.” According to Huibert Vigeveno, Shell’s downstream, renewables, and energy solutions director, “Temporarily pausing on-site construction now will allow us to assess the most commercial way forward for the project.” Translation: “We’re figuring out how to make more money off this before pretending to care about the planet again.” read more

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Shell’s New “Eco-Friendly” Stunt: Two Carbon Capture Projects in Alberta

Jun 28th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 28 June 2024

Shell Gives the Green Light to Carbon Capture Shenanigans in Alberta – Whoop-de-doo!

So, the bigwigs at Shell have decided to throw us another bone and announced not one, but two shiny new carbon capture projects in Alberta. Because, apparently, the oil giant known for its greed and pollution suddenly wants to save the planet. Cue the applause.

The company proudly declared the launch of the Polaris carbon capture project at its Scotford refinery and chemicals complex near Fort Saskatchewan. And let’s not forget the Atlas Carbon Storage Hub, a grand partnership with Atco EnPower. The first phase will allegedly store the CO2 captured by the Polaris project. Because what’s better than an oil giant patting itself on the back for trying to clean up its own mess? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Sir Andrew Mackenzie and Shell’s Delusional Climate “Solutions”

Jun 24th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 24 June 2024

Ah, Sir Andrew Mackenzie, the knight in shining oil-stained armour, has graced us with his profound wisdom on tackling climate change. Who would have thought that solving one of the world’s biggest crises could be more challenging than running a mining company? Not Sir Andrew, apparently.

In a revelation that’s about as surprising as finding sand in the desert, Sir Andrew admits that handling climate change at Shell is “quite a lot harder than I expected.” You see, at BHP, he could comfortably discuss all sorts of theoretical climate solutions without actually having to implement them. Now, faced with the greasy reality at Shell, things aren’t so easy. read more

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Shell Buys Pavilion Energy: Because Who Needs Clean Energy Anyway?

Jun 20th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 20 June 2024

In a move that’s sure to make environmentalists everywhere throw up in their mouths a little, Shell, the world’s top LNG trader and our favourite oil-stained villain is beefing up its fossil fuel empire by buying Pavilion Energy. Yes, you heard that right. Shell is doubling down on liquefied natural gas because apparently, climate change isn’t happening fast enough.

Shell announced on Tuesday that its subsidiary, Shell Eastern Trading Pte. Ltd., has inked a deal with Carne Investments Pte. Ltd., an indirect subsidiary of Temasek, to snatch up 100% of Pavilion Energy. What better way to celebrate summer than by acquiring yet another company to exploit natural resources? read more

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20th Anniversary of one of Shell’s biggest scandals

Jun 12th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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2004: The oil giant was heavily fined for overstating its reserves in a securities fraud. Shell chairman Sir Philip Watts was forced to resign. He was escorted in disgrace from the Shell Centre by Security guards. He became a very rich vicar. 

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READABLE VERSION

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Shell Shocked: Climate Protestors Scrub the Greenwash Off Aberdeen Office

Jun 10th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 10 June 2024

In a twist of poetic justice, climate activists took to Shell’s Aberdeen office with a literal washing machine and bath to “clean up” the company’s act. Early Monday morning, Extinction Rebellion Scotland showed up outside Union Street with a banner demanding that Shell stop its “greenwashing and destructive climate policies.”

Because nothing says “we care about the environment” quite like spewing out misleading ads and backpedalling on climate commitments, right Shell?

Shell’s grandstanding on its so-called green initiatives has been exposed by advertising standards bodies in both the UK and the Netherlands for—you guessed it—misleading green campaigns. Shocker!

According to Extinction Rebellion (XR), Shell’s notorious past is riddled with climate misinformation, denial, human rights abuses, and pollution. In true Shell fashion, they’re now backtracking on previously announced carbon reduction targets. read more

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“Godfathers of Climate Chaos”: UN Chief Calls Out Shell and BP, Demands Global Ad Ban

Jun 5th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 5 June 2024

Hold onto your hats, folks. António Guterres, the UN Secretary-General, just dropped a bombshell that should make the fossil-fuel overlords squirm in their plush boardroom chairs. Shell and BP, among others, are now being labeled the “godfathers of climate chaos.” That’s right, the planet-wrecking tycoons might soon find themselves banned from advertising, much like those pesky tobacco companies.

In a scorching speech in New York, Guterres took no prisoners, calling out news and tech media for enabling “planetary destruction” by taking dirty oil money. “We are at climate crunch time,” he declared, unveiling terrifying new data from the World Meteorological Organization (WMO) showing we’re on the brink of surpassing 1.5C warming. The recent 12 months have already pushed the global temperature to a blistering 1.63C above pre-industrial levels. Fun times ahead! read more

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Shell CEO’s Climate Love Letter: “It’s All Good” Says the Planet’s Top Polluter

Jun 4th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 4 June 2024

In a twist straight out of a dystopian satire, Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan decided to back President Biden’s climate agenda with a level of enthusiasm typically reserved for used car salesmen and snake oil peddlers.

At an event hosted by the Center for Strategic and International Studies, Sawan showered praise on Biden’s bipartisan infrastructure law and Inflation Reduction Act, claiming they’re “attracting a significant amount of capital in different states, whether it’s a red or blue state.” Oh, how inclusive.

“You’re creating jobs. You’re actually starting to anchor new industries. And over time, what you will do is you will create supply chains locally that are able to satisfy the demands of many of these industries,” he gushed. “That’s all good.” Yes, because nothing screams “environmental stewardship” like a fossil fuel titan suddenly championing green jobs.

This revelation comes as a shock only to those living under a rock, considering Shell’s recent break from the broader oil industry to advocate for the IRA – a law passed solely by Democrats and opposed by every single Republican. Shell, ever the opportunist, now champions clean energy portions of the law to fend off potential GOP attacks. read more

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Shareholders Can’t Agree if Shell Should Keep Pretending to Care About the Climate or Just Admit They’re in it for the Money

May 28th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 28 May 2024

Shell’s Climate Plan Rejected by Activist Shareholders at AGM, Because Who Needs the Planet Anyway?

Shell plc’s annual general meeting (AGM) turned into a circus of protests and shareholder squabbling, with a climate resolution from activist group Follow This getting shot down in flames. The resolution, supported by 27 investors managing around $4 trillion (chump change for Shell), aimed to align Shell’s medium-term carbon reduction targets with the Paris Agreement. Only 18.6% of shareholders gave a damn, down from last year’s whopping 20.2%.

Shell’s “New and Improved” Strategy

Meanwhile, Shell’s board’s half-baked climate strategy received a resounding 78.2% thumbs up from shareholders. This master plan rolled out in March, sets a groundbreaking goal of a 15-20% reduction in the net carbon intensity of energy products by 2030. Never mind that it’s a step back from the previous 20% target and completely ditches the 2035 goal. Shell’s CEO, Wael Sawan, assured everyone that this plan is all about keeping profits high, mostly from oil and gas, because, you know, gas demand is booming, and who can predict the future of energy transition, right? read more

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Shell to Save Asia with More Pollution and Broken Promises

May 22nd, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by JOHN DONOVAN: 22 May 2024

In the latest episode of “How to Ruin the Planet While Making Billions,” Shell, the infamous oil behemoth, has announced that it will generously provide more liquefied natural gas (LNG) to emerging Asian markets. Because what could be better for countries like the Philippines, Thailand, Vietnam, and Bangladesh than a hefty dose of fossil fuels?

Asian spot LNG prices hit their highest levels since January last week, thanks to scorching weather that left everyone sweltering and clamoring for that sweet, sweet “super-chilled fuel.” Shell’s Country Chair in Australia, Cecile Wake, beamed with pride as she revealed this grand plan at the Australian Energy Producers Conference. According to her, “That combination of decarbonisation, and declining domestic production (will drive LNG demand growth).” Yes, nothing screams decarbonization like ramping up fossil fuel production. read more

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Shell AGM: Shareholders Cheer for Profits Over Planet, Reject Climate Resolution Amid Protests

May 21st, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 21 May 2024

In a shocking display of corporate bravado and environmental disdain, Shell’s shareholders once again proved they couldn’t care less about the planet. At Tuesday’s annual general meeting, they overwhelmingly rejected a climate resolution filed by the activist group Follow This, despite the backdrop of vehement protests.

This climate resolution, mind you, was backed by 27 investors managing a whopping $4 trillion. These forward-thinkers dared to suggest that Shell should align its carbon emissions reduction targets with the Paris Climate Agreement. The nerve! But alas, only 18.6% of the shareholders supported it, a decline from last year’s modest 20%. Apparently, Shell’s board had already made it crystal clear that such eco-friendly suggestions were unwelcome. read more

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Shell’s AGM Spectacle: A Symphony of Greenwashing and Protester Evictions

May 21st, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 21 May 2024

In what can only be described as a bizarre mix of a bad corporate play and a tragic comedy, Shell’s annual general meeting (AGM) saw its chairman Sir Andrew MacKenzie facing the wrath of climate protesters accusing him of “greenwashing.” Yes, the oil behemoth’s top brass had the nerve to gather at the posh InterContinental London – The O2 hotel to deliver their usual drivel about being eco-friendly while their actions scream otherwise. read more

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Shell’s Sustainability Saga: Striving for Change While Exxon Laughs All the Way to the Bank

Apr 30th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 30 April 2024

In a world where the concept of environmental responsibility seems as elusive as a unicorn in a concrete jungle, Shell stands as a shining beacon of… well, maybe not. Let’s call it a flickering candle in a hurricane of pollution. According to the Carbon Majors Database, a staggering 80% of greenhouse gas emissions are linked to just 57 companies, and guess who’s playing second fiddle? That’s right, our dear old Shell, right behind ExxonMobil, the world’s big, bad, oil-slicked villain. read more

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Shell Down Under: Prelude of Profits or Prelude to Disaster?

Apr 19th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 19 April 2024

Well, folks, gather ’round for another riveting episode of “Shell’s Great Aussie Adventure,” where the profits are plummeting faster than a kangaroo on a trampoline! In the latest saga, our beloved oil behemoth, Shell, has taken yet another hefty blow on its floating Prelude LNG project in sunny north-west WA. But fear not, mates, because the real kicker? They still managed to ship a cool $4 billion back to their global parent! Talk about priorities, right? read more

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Shell Unveils Eco-Friendly Fairy Tale: Bio-LNG Plant in Germany

Apr 19th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 19 April 2024

Well, well, well, folks, gather round for another installment of “Shell’s Magical Greenwashing Adventure!” In today’s episode, our favourite fossil fuel giant, Shell, is pulling a rabbit out of its hat and launching what it claims to be the largest bio-LNG production plant in Germany. Cue the applause, right?

Yes, you heard that correctly. Shell, the company known for its environmental cough consciousness, is now touting its shiny new bio-LNG plant as the solution to all our climate woes. Because nothing says “saving the planet” like pumping out more liquefied natural gas, right? read more

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Shell Left Sputtering as Netherlands Closes Groningen Gas Field for Good

Apr 17th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 17 April 2024

Well, well, well, looks like the Netherlands is finally saying “buh-bye” to the Groningen gas field, leaving Shell scratching its head and counting its losses.

Yep, you heard it right. The Dutch Senate has slammed the door shut on Groningen, putting an end to decades of gas extraction in the region. No more tapping into Mother Earth for those sweet, sweet fossil fuels.

Why, you ask? Oh, just a little thing called seismic risks. Apparently, all that drilling was causing a bit of a ruckus underground, leading to earthquakes that made buildings shake like a leaf in a hurricane. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.
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