Shell — the world’s favourite greenwashing juggernaut — is once again proving that its true superpower isn’t drilling oil. It’s drilling holes in the tax system. It’s merger mania, and while executives claim it’s about “scale” and “flexibility in a declining basin,” every tax lawyer and banker worth their bonus knows the real prize: huge future profits with minimal tax bills.
Posted By John Donovan: 15 April 2025
In a move that would make even the most shameless tax accountant blush, Shell and its oily comrades have been busy merging their way out of billions in tax liabilities across the North Sea — all while crying about how unfair their taxes are.
Because when you’re one of the most profitable polluters on Earth, nothing screams “innovation” like ducking your fiscal responsibilities through creative accounting.
💸 Mergers That Smell Like Money (Saved)
Here’s the scheme — sorry, “strategy” — in action:
🤡 Unplanned Maintenance, Cyclones, and a Whole Lot of Fossil Fuel Fantasy
Shell Games: Oil Slicks, Exploding Death Boats, and the Whistleblower They’d Rather You Forget 
Ah, Shell—the oil-slicked titan of greed, pollution, and profit-before-planet whose moral compass seems to point straight to the nearest offshore tax haven. You’d think this global goliath of carbon chaos would be comfortably lounging atop its pile of petrodollars. But no, even they aren’t safe from Wall Street’s cold, calculating buzzards. Enter Elliott Management: the hedge fund equivalent of a vulture on steroids, now circling Shell like it’s a wounded gazelle.
Investors hoping for something even remotely resembling a conscience will be sorely disappointed. 
EBOOK TITLE: “SIR HENRI DETERDING AND THE NAZI HISTORY OF ROYAL DUTCH SHELL” – AVAILABLE ON AMAZON
EBOOK TITLE: “JOHN DONOVAN, SHELL’S NIGHTMARE: MY EPIC FEUD WITH THE UNSCRUPULOUS OIL GIANT ROYAL DUTCH SHELL” – AVAILABLE ON AMAZON.
EBOOK TITLE: “TOXIC FACTS ABOUT SHELL REMOVED FROM WIKIPEDIA: HOW SHELL BECAME THE MOST HATED BRAND IN THE WORLD” – AVAILABLE ON AMAZON.
