Shell Uses AI to Save the Planet (While Continuing to Destroy It): A Masterclass in Hypocrisy

Posted by John Donovan: 20 Dec 2024

Step right up, folks, and witness the miraculous transformation of Shell Plc—the fossil fuel giant with a century-long legacy of plundering the planet—into a self-proclaimed champion of clean energy and AI innovation. Yes, Shell, the company that has spilt more oil than most countries produce, now wants you to believe it’s harnessing artificial intelligence to save the world. What’s next? Big Tobacco solving lung cancer?

According to Shell’s VP of Digital Innovation, Dan Jeavons, “AI is not a silver bullet, but it is a tool that can help us accelerate energy transition and reduce CO2 emissions.” Oh, Dan, how quaint. Shell has spent decades perfecting the art of PR spin, and this is a gem: “reduce CO2 emissions” from the company that’s one of the largest carbon polluters on the planet. Bravo.

AI: The Savior Shell Doesn’t Deserve (and Definitely Won’t Use Right)

Let’s dive into the details of Shell’s latest AI schemes, shall we? Partnering with NVIDIA (because nothing screams “green future” like teaming up with a tech company with its own massive carbon footprint), Shell is using AI to accelerate simulations for carbon capture and storage (CCS). That’s right, they’re speeding up the process of burying their emissions so they can keep pumping more oil and gas out of the ground.

How fast, you ask? Shell boasts simulations are running “up to a million times faster than traditional methods.” Well, hallelujah! They can now make bad decisions faster than ever before. This, of course, is framed as a victory for the environment. Because if you can’t stop polluting, you might as well pollute with the efficiency of a Silicon Valley startup.

Meet the Real Heroes: BlackRock and Vanguard

Oh, and let’s not forget the unsung heroes funding this eco-hypocrisy: BlackRock and Vanguard, two of Shell’s biggest investors. While Shell greenwashes its image, these financial giants laugh all the way to the bank. After all, nothing says “sustainable investing” like raking in profits from a company that’s drilling the planet dry while pretending to care about clean energy.

A Grid of Lies

Shell’s AI fairy tale doesn’t stop at carbon capture. They’re also using it to “reimagine the power grid” in a world of distributed energy sources. According to Marc Spieler of NVIDIA, this is all about managing a future with millions of solar panels, EVs, and batteries. Conveniently, Shell doesn’t mention that their business model relies on selling fossil fuels to power this so-called green grid.

But wait, there’s more! Shell’s machine vision systems, powered by—you guessed it—AI, are now being deployed to monitor emissions and ensure worker safety. Nothing screams “corporate responsibility” like spending billions on AI while fighting environmental lawsuits in courtrooms around the world.

Empowering Employees (to Ignore the Bigger Picture)

Shell proudly trumpets its “democratizing AI” initiative, allowing thousands of employees to develop their own AI solutions. It’s like giving every firefighter in a burning building a squirt gun while Shell keeps tossing matches into the inferno. Sure, empowering employees sounds great, but what about empowering the planet not to cook itself into oblivion?

Greenwashing the Future

Shell wants you to believe it’s using AI to lead the energy transition. Meanwhile, it continues raking billions from fossil fuels, announcing projects like the $10 billion Bonga North deepwater oil monstrosity in Nigeria. So much for “reducing emissions.”

And don’t be fooled by the talk of “clean energy research.” It’s all about prolonging Shell’s fossil-fueled stranglehold on the energy sector while throwing just enough scraps at renewables to keep regulators and critics at bay.

This whole AI charade is just the latest chapter in Shell’s long history of saying one thing and doing the exact opposite. For every dollar they spend on AI-powered carbon capture, they’re spending exponentially more drilling, polluting, and profiting.

So, to Shell, BlackRock, Vanguard, and anyone else complicit in this greenwashing circus: spare us the sanctimony. The only thing Shell is truly transforming is the timeline to climate catastrophe.

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