Hakluyt & Company

Will Shell Finally Swallow BP?

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This article was generated with the support of AI and reviewed by an editor for factual accuracy and satirical tone.

The fossil fuel fanfiction nobody asked for is back: Shell might finally devour BP — in what could become the biggest unholy alliance since, well… Shell and apartheid South Africa.

That’s right: after years of flirting and fumbling, the dirtiest merger fantasy in Big Oil is once again swirling through boardrooms and Bloomberg alerts.

Why now? Because activist hedge fund Elliott Management just bought a nearly 5% stake in BP and immediately demanded a boardroom bloodletting. Cue another round of speculation that Shell, Chevron, ADNOC, or some other oil-drunk conglomerate might swoop in and “rescue” BP from its decade-long identity crisis. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, shellnews.net, and shellwikipedia.com, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell to Nigeria: Here’s Some Benzene and a Legal Brick Wall. Good Luck!

Apr 8th, 2025

by admin.

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Oil Giant Faces High Court While Still Dodging Accountability Like It’s a Sport

LONDON, APRIL 2025 — It’s the trial that should make your blood boil (unless it’s already poisoned with benzene, in which case you may want to sue Shell). In a London courtroom lined with empty bookcases—symbolic, perhaps, of Shell’s moral library—two Nigerian communities are fighting for the basic right to drink water that doesn’t cause cancer.

Shell? They’re fighting tooth and nail to avoid handing over documents that might reveal what they knew, when they knew it, and how long they sat on their gold-plated hands while entire ecosystems died in oil-soaked silence. read more

Hakluyt: The Spooky Spy Firm That Swears It’s Totally Independent (While Still Schmoozing Shell, BP & the British Establishment)

Mar 24th, 2025

by John Donovan.

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By John Donovan: 24 March 2025

When your clients include Shell, your alumni include MI6, and your letters end up on the desk of a Church of England lawyer… yeah, “independent” is doing a lot of heavy lifting.

Ah, Hakluyt — the Bond-esque boutique “advisory” firm that insists it’s not spooky anymore, despite being founded by MI6 veterans, crawling with political insiders, and forever orbiting the oily gravitational pull of companies like Shell and , those lovable eco-saboteurs who just want to profit while the world burns.

In his first public interview as Hakluyt’s new managing partner, Thomas Ellis reassured us all with a totally believable promise: that the firm is determined to stay “independent” — even as the consulting world consolidates faster than Shell’s ethics in an oil spill. read more

Shell + BP: The UK’s Favorite Oil Villains and Their Spying Side Hustle

Mar 19th, 2025

by John Donovan.

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Ah, the latest thrilling instalment in the saga of the UK’s most ruthless polluters—Shell and BP! This time, the British government might need one villain to rescue the other. Because when your country’s energy strategy revolves around two corporate behemoths that specialise in environmental destruction, economic extortion, and good old-fashioned espionage (hi, Hakluyt!), what could possibly go wrong?

Let’s start with BP—currently flailing like a fish on an oil-slicked shoreline. After its spectacular failure to pivot from fossil fuels to renewables (who could’ve guessed that wasn’t done in good faith?), BP’s stock is circling the drain. CEO Murray Auchincloss’s brilliant plan to double down on oil and gas has failed to excite investors, and hedge fund shark Elliott Management now holds a 5% stake, sniffing around for a board shake-up and even more brutal cost-cutting.

Meanwhile, rumours abound that BP could be scooped up by an American oil giant or a Gulf national oil company. Because, sure, when a British corporation becomes a liability, the logical move is to sell it to the highest international bidder. And why not? BP still has prime assets worldwide—shale basins in the U.S., Gulf of Mexico drilling, operations in Brazil, the North Sea, and the Middle East, not to mention its trading business and retail brand. Last year, it cranked out 2.36 million barrels of oil per day, generating a cool $8.9 billion in net profit. What’s not to love? read more

Spills, Spies, and Lies: Shell’s Slick Exit from Nigeria

Mar 15th, 2025

by admin.

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**Wall Street is an invisible partner in Shell’s plunder: happy to enjoy the spoils, deaf to the spoils of war Shell waged on Nigeria’s environment**

Cue the confetti: Shell is finally packing its bags after 87 years in Nigeria’s Niger Delta. But before anyone applauds, note that the oil giant is slipping out the back door largely to avoid cleaning up the monumental mess it created, all while still clinging to the profitable parts of the business. In a $2.8 billion “exit” deal announced in January, Shell agreed to sell its onshore Nigerian subsidiary to a local consortium called Renaissance. How noble—except Shell isn’t really riding off into the sunset. The company generously decided to loan the buyers $1.2 billion to help them purchase Shell’s assets and will pony up another $1.3 billion to fund future cleanup and gas projects. Why would an exiting company invest further? Perhaps because those projects conveniently benefit Shell’s remaining 25.6% stake in Nigeria’s gas enterprise. In other words, Shell is getting paid to “leave” while secretly keeping a foot in the door and a hand in the cookie jar. read more

Shell + BP: The Merger That No One (Except Greedy Investors) Wants

Feb 21st, 2025

by admin.

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The rumour mill is churning once again, and this time it’s spitting out an absolute gem: a possible Shell-BP merger. That’s right—two of the most unapologetically polluting, ruthlessly profit-driven oil behemoths are being whispered about in the same breath as “consolidation” and “global energy leadership.” Clearly, what the world needs right now is a bigger super-polluter with even more unchecked power.

Wall Street’s Fantasy, The World’s Nightmare

According to industry chatter, Shell and BP could merge to create a single European oil colossus with a market cap of around $300 billion. The goal? Competing with the likes of ExxonMobil and Chevron—because nothing screams progress like two of the worst climate offenders joining forces to crush the competition. read more

BP + Shell: A Merger of Big Oil, Bigger Lies, and Corporate Espionage

Feb 17th, 2025

by admin.

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(article exposing Shell BP spying operations)

Published same day in the same newspaper

BP + Shell: A Merger of Big Oil and Corporate Espionage: When Spying on Environmentalists Just Isn’t Enough, Merge and Double the Surveillance!

Forget the usual corporate greed—if BP and Shell merge, they won’t just be pooling their oil assets, they’ll be consolidating their dirty tricks, too. Because what’s better than one morally bankrupt fossil fuel giant? Two, working together to crush dissent, spy on activists, and ensure the climate crisis is well-funded for decades to come.

BP + Shell: More Than Just Oil Profiteers—They’re Professional Spymasters, Too

Both BP and Shell have spent decades using the shady London-based intelligence firm Hakluyt to spy on activists, journalists, and anyone else who dares to question their environmental destruction. While Greenpeace and other climate groups were busy warning the world about the climate crisis, BP and Shell were busy infiltrating them. read more

Shell on Trial: The Oil Giant That Poisoned Nigeria Now Faces Justice—If It Can’t Buy Its Way Out

Feb 14th, 2025

by admin.

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Because Profits Matter More Than Human Lives, Right?

Shell—the undisputed champion of pollution, corporate greed, and dodging responsibility—is finally being forced to answer for its decades of devastation in Nigeria’s Niger Delta. On February 13, 2025, the High Court in London opened proceedings against the oil giant, as the Bille and Ogale communities fight to hold Shell accountable for the destruction of their land, water, and livelihoods.

Decades of Spills, Zero Accountability

The 50,000 people living in these communities have spent years living with Shell’s toxic legacy—hundreds of oil spills from Shell’s pipelines, leaving their water undrinkable, their farmland useless, and their health in ruins. And despite making billions in profits from Nigeria’s oil, Shell has offered nothing in terms of compensation or cleanup. Absolutely nothing. read more

Shell on Trial: The Oil Giant That Poisoned Nigeria

Feb 13th, 2025

by admin.

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Shell on Trial: The Oil Giant That Poisoned Nigeria and Cashed In

Because Who Needs Ethics When You Have Billions?

Once again, Shell—the ultimate sin stock, planetary arsonist, and poster child for corporate greed—finds itself in a UK courtroom, forced to answer for decades of devastation, pollution, and suffering in Nigeria.

On Thursday, as thousands of people sued Shell and its Nigerian subsidiary, SPDC, over catastrophic oil spills in the Niger Delta, protesters gathered outside London’s High Court to remind the world that Shell’s business model is built on ruining lives, destroying ecosystems, and dodging accountability. read more

Shell’s Dirty Little Secret: Fake Clean-Ups, Corrupt Deals, and a Trail of Devastation

Feb 12th, 2025

by admin.

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Shell’s Business Model: Pollute, Lie, Profit, Repeat: The Real Question: Why Is Shell Still Allowed to Exist?

In a plot twist that surprises absolutely no one, a BBC investigation has exposed Shell for what it truly is—a ruthless, polluting oil giant that lies about cleaning up its mess while quietly slipping out the back door with billions in profit.

A Billion-Dollar ‘Clean-Up’ That Cleans Nothing

Let’s start with Shell’s so-called $1 billion oil clean-up in Nigeria—a project that was supposed to remedy the decades of environmental destruction Shell has inflicted on Ogoniland. But according to a whistleblower, the entire operation is a scam designed to fool the public while stuffing politicians’ pockets. read more

Shell’s Arctic Hypocrisy: Funding Putin’s War with Kremlin-Escorted Gas Shipments

Feb 11th, 2025

by John Donovan.

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Oh look, another day, another example of Shell doing what Shell does best—putting profit over morality, humanity, and basic decency. This time, the fossil fuel giant has found itself in the middle of a geopolitical scandal, buying Russian liquefied natural gas (LNG) while its shipments are escorted by sanctioned, Kremlin-backed nuclear icebreakers.

Yes, while the world watches Ukraine burn and Western leaders scramble to cut off Putin’s war machine, Shell has been lining Moscow’s pockets with cold, hard cash. But don’t worry—Shell’s PR team is on the case, insisting that everything is technically legal. Because nothing says corporate responsibility like funding a war as long as there’s a legal loophole. read more

Shell Faces Judgment Day

Feb 11th, 2025

by John Donovan.

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Shell Faces Judgment Day: 10 Years of Delays, Spills, and Corporate Lies Finally Head to UK High Court

It’s finally happening. After a decade of legal stonewalling, corporate gaslighting, and enough environmental devastation to make even the most soulless investors blush, Shell is being dragged—kicking and screaming—into the UK High Court. Because nothing says “responsible corporate citizen” quite like spending ten years arguing that the destruction of entire communities isn’t legally your problem.

From February 13 to March 10, 2025, the Preliminary Issues Trial of Nigerian Law for Shell vs. Ogale and Bille communities will take place in London. That’s right—Nigerian communities are being forced to travel to a foreign country just to have a chance at justice, because Shell has mastered the art of denying responsibility while profiting off the suffering of others. read more

Speaking of the Prince Harry case and Corporate Spying… Let’s Talk About Shell

Jan 22nd, 2025

by admin.

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If you thought NGN was bad, just wait until you hear about Shell’s dirty tricks. While News Corp has been busy hacking phones, Shell has been spying on its own employees, critics and whistleblowers for decades.

By John Donovan: Posted 22 January 25]

Prince Harry just pulled off what many thought was impossible—forcing one of the most powerful media empires to admit to its illegal, underhanded, and downright disgusting tactics. After a relentless five-year legal battle, News Group Newspapers (NGN) has finally folded, coughing up a full and unequivocal apology for years of unlawful surveillance, phone hacking, and privacy violations that targeted not just the Duke of Sussex, but thousands of others.

And let’s not forget: this is the same media empire that repeatedly lied under oath, destroyed 30 million emails to obstruct justice, and engaged in a massive cover-up to protect its most senior executives, including Rebekah Brooks, who once had the audacity to claim that, “When I was editor of The Sun, we ran a clean ship.” Sure, and now, a decade later, that “clean ship” turns out to have been a full-fledged criminal enterprise. read more

‘Watch Your Back’ Warning to Shell Prelude Whistleblower Irina Woodhead

Jan 15th, 2025

by John Donovan.

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Shell – The Sin Stock That Keeps on Sinning

Posted by John Donovan: 15 Jan 25

They say money makes the world go round, but at Shell, it also makes the world burn, drown, and choke on toxic fumes. For decades, this greedy, ruthless oil giant has been the poster child for corporate malfeasance, environmental destruction, and whistleblower persecution. Let’s not mince words: Shell is not just a company; it’s an evil empire masquerading as an energy conglomerate, bankrolled by investors like BlackRock, who are apparently too busy counting their profits to notice the carnage. read more

Shell-Shocked: The Sinister World of Surveillance, Spy Games, and Shell’s Shadowy Past

Dec 23rd, 2024

by admin.

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Posted by John Donovan: 23 Dec 24

Ah, Shell, that global paragon of corporate virtue (read: greed), is at it again—reminding the world that profit always comes first, no matter the cost. With a track record as smooth as an oil spill, Shell has managed to combine ruthless ambition, a touch of espionage, and an uncanny ability to slide through controversies unscathed. Let’s dive into the murky depths of corporate surveillance.

A Glimpse into Corporate Espionage

Imagine sitting in a piss-drenched doorway, pretending to be homeless, just to “eyeball” a target across the street. One moment you’re incognito, the next you’re suited up, tailing someone through the City and “ripping” their phone—a polite euphemism for illegally downloading its contents. This isn’t a spy movie; it’s just another day in the life of a private investigator. read more

WTF Shell? The Oil Giant’s Twisted Tango with Nigeria

Dec 20th, 2024

by John Donovan.

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Posted by John Donovan: 20 Dec 2024

Once again, Shell, the paragon of corporate ruthlessness and environmental degradation, proves there’s no mess too big to sweep under a rug made of oil-stained dollar bills. The Anglo-Dutch juggernaut, whose rap sheet includes everything from massive spills to good old-fashioned espionage through shadowy outfits like Hakluyt & Co., has pulled off another jaw-dropping manoeuvre in Nigeria.

Here’s the skinny: Shell just tied a shiny $5 billion investment in Nigeria’s offshore Bonga North project to the government greenlighting their exit from onshore oil operations in the Niger Delta—a region they’ve poisoned for decades. Bravo, Shell! Nothing screams corporate responsibility like strong-arming a country desperate for foreign investment. read more

30 November 2023: Posted by John Donovan

The content below is sourced from current verifiable customer reviews of Shell Energy published on Trustpilot.
Extremely slow broadband for 10 months, not fixed. I have had slow broadband well below the guaranteed speed for 10 months and Shell Energy have not been able to fix it. They have tried sending about 4 or 5 engineers but have not fixed the problem. Gurps, who I have been dealing with most recently, has been friendly and polite, alth… Read more

Extremely Slow Shell Broadband

Hakluyt & Company

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When your clients include Shell, your alumni include MI6, and your letters end up on the desk of a Church of England lawyer… yeah, “independent” is doing a lot of heavy lifting.

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Wall Street is an invisible partner in Shell’s plunder: happy to enjoy the spoils, deaf to the spoils of war Shell waged on Nigeria’s environment

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Wall Street’s Fantasy, The World’s Nightmare

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BP + Shell: A Merger of Big Oil and Corporate Espionage: When Spying on Environmentalists Just Isn’t Enough, Merge and Double the Surveillance!

BP + Shell: More Than Just Oil Profiteers—They’re Professional Spymasters, Too

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Because Profits Matter More Than Human Lives, Right?

Decades of Spills, Zero Accountability

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Shell on Trial: The Oil Giant That Poisoned Nigeria and Cashed In

Because Who Needs Ethics When You Have Billions?

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Shell’s Business Model: Pollute, Lie, Profit, Repeat: The Real Question: Why Is Shell Still Allowed to Exist?

A Billion-Dollar ‘Clean-Up’ That Cleans Nothing

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Shell Faces Judgment Day: 10 Years of Delays, Spills, and Corporate Lies Finally Head to UK High Court

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If you thought NGN was bad, just wait until you hear about Shell’s dirty tricks. While News Corp has been busy hacking phones, Shell has been spying on its own employees, critics and whistleblowers for decades.

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Shell – The Sin Stock That Keeps on Sinning

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**Wall Street is an invisible partner in Shell’s plunder: happy to enjoy the spoils, deaf to the spoils of war Shell waged on Nigeria’s environment**