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Shell’s New Hell Factory in Pennsylvania: Residents Basking in the Glow of Deadly Carcinogens

Jun 28th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 28 June 2024

Welcome to Beaver County, Pennsylvania, where Shell’s ethane cracker plant has turned the community into a living nightmare. Residents are now basking in the glow of carcinogens and other delightful chemicals that can cause blood disorders, convulsions, and breathing problems. Some folks have even fled the area.

Well, well, well, what do we have here? Shell, the beloved corporate villain, has once again proven that it’s never too late to outdo itself in the race to the bottom. Welcome to Beaver County, Pennsylvania, where Shell’s ethane cracker plant has turned the community into a living nightmare. Who could’ve guessed? Oh, wait – everyone.

What’s Happening?

In a dazzling display of corporate gaslighting, Shell promised Beaver County that its ethane cracker plant would be a magical land of employment, tax revenue, and economic bliss. So, Pennsylvania, in its infinite wisdom, handed Shell a cool $1.65 billion to set up shop. Fast forward two years, and surprise! The plant has racked up 23 violations of air quality and clean water standards, like a delinquent teenager collecting detention slips. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Emergency Drill at Cracker Plant: Because What Could Possibly Go Wrong?

Jun 20th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan 20 June 2024

Pennsylvania Shell ethylene cracker plant

Today at the Shell cracker plant in Beaver County, it’s not business as usual. Shell, the lovable titan of pollution, is conducting an emergency response drill. Yep, you read that right. The same company that brings you environmental disasters is practising how to handle one. The irony is delicious.

A Shell spokesperson stated that this drill is a regulatory requirement that must be completed every three years. Of course, because if there’s one thing Shell loves, it’s jumping through hoops to meet the bare minimum legal requirements. During today’s festivities, alarms will be blaring, and an emergency response team will be parading along the Ohio River. If you’re in the area and hear sirens, don’t panic—this time, it’s just a drill. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Bold New Plan: Running Away to the Land of Fossil Fuel Fanatics

Jun 20th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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No shit, Sherlock. Moving your headquarters across the Atlantic isn’t exactly like booking a vacation.

Posted by John Donovan: 20 June 2024

In the latest episode of “What the Actual F**k?”, Shell, that lovable giant known for its charming pollution and undying greed, is considering jumping ship to the good ol’ U.S. of A. Yes, you heard it right! Rigzone conducted some riveting interviews with analysts to get the scoop on this potential exodus. Spoiler alert: it’s all about money and less about saving the planet.

According to Patrick Rutty, the Director of Global Intelligence at Enverus, “It is a widely shared perception these days that there’s no better place to be a listed oil and gas company than America, owing largely to its relatively fossil fuel-friendly investors.” Well, duh. If you’re a company that thrives on drilling holes in the earth and spewing carbon, the U.S. is practically Disney World.

Rutty also spilt the beans that back in 2021, Royal Dutch Shell “shucked its first and middle names” and moved its tax residence from the Netherlands to the UK after a Dutch court called their carbon emissions plans lame. Apparently, London is now a “problematic” home too because of Brexit. Who would’ve guessed? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Corporate Accountability 1, Greedy Giants 0

Jun 12th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Shell got off scot-free despite strong evidence they were up to their necks in aiding the Nigerian military’s torture and killing spree against environmental protesters.

Posted by John Donovan: 12 June 2024

In a rare twist of fate where the universe temporarily operates on justice, Chiquita Brands was held accountable for its cosy relationship with murderous paramilitaries in Colombia. A Florida jury just slapped the fruit giant with a $38.3 million bill for the deaths of eight people, putting a price tag on human lives lost in Chiquita’s quest for banana empire dominance.

You see, back in the late 90s and early 2000s, Chiquita thought it was a brilliant idea to pay almost $2 million to the United Self-Defense Forces of Colombia (AUC), a right-wing death squad. In return, these thugs made sure the land was ripe for banana farming, even if it meant killing and displacing locals. The AUC, a group so charming they got themselves labeled a foreign terrorist organization by the U.S., happily did the dirty work while Chiquita reaped the benefits. Fast forward to 2024, and the families of eight victims have finally been granted a slice of justice. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Generosity: Funding Air Monitors to Track Their Own Pollution

Jun 7th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted 7 June 2024 by John Donovan

Pennsylvania Shell ethylene cracker plant

In a stunning display of corporate altruism, Shell, the benevolent oil giant known for its tender care of the environment, has graciously agreed to part with over $630,000. This sum, a mere trifle from the $10 million in penalties they’ve amassed, will be used by environmental watchdog groups to install five real-time air monitors throughout Beaver County. Because, you know, it’s easier just to keep track of how much pollution you’re breathing in rather than stop polluting.

The Beaver County Marcellus Awareness Community (BCMAC) is partnering with the Environmental Health Project to deploy these monitors. According to a Monday news release, the goal is to “analyze, visualize and interpret the data collected from these monitors to help community members understand where the air pollution is coming from and what health outcomes they may expect.” Translation: “Let’s help you pinpoint exactly how Shell’s pollution is killing you.”

BCMAC will also “provide community education about air pollution and the health impacts associated with exposure to emissions from petrochemical facilities.” This initiative stems from activists’ long-standing demand for increased monitoring near Shell’s ethane cracker plant, which started operations in late 2022. Ah yes, education – because knowing you’re being poisoned is half the battle. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Grandiose Failure: How the Cracker Plant Stunk Up Beaver County

Jun 4th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 4 June 2024

Well, well, well. Look who’s back in the headlines: Shell, the benevolent oil overlord, gracing us with its latest triumph. Remember that glorious cracker plant in Beaver County that was supposed to shower us with jobs and economic bliss? Yeah, that one. Turns out, it’s more of an economic disaster and environmental nightmare. Bravo, Shell!

Shell promised a “minor environmental impact” – a cute understatement considering they’ve racked up $10 million in fines for air pollution violations. Ah, the sweet smell of success. Beaver residents get to enjoy this lovely aroma while watching the supposed economic boom fizzle into a depressing bust. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Unfortunate Love Affair with the US: The UK Stock Market Saga

May 16th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Charles Hall from Peel Hunt warns that if Shell goes, it’s going to be an absolute hammer blow for London, with a domino effect dragging BP and big mining companies along.

Posted by John Donovan: 16 May 2024

Don’t Worry, UK Stock Market Is Totally Fine, Says Stock Market Boss as Major Firms Flee for the US

In the latest episode of “The UK is Totally Fine,” the head honcho of the London Stock Exchange, Julia Hoggett, assures us there’s absolutely no panic even as firms worth hundreds of billions decide they’d rather take their chances across the pond. Because, why wouldn’t they?

Bigwig bosses have been crying existential crisis to the BBC, pointing out that major companies are either packing up, considering the move, or being swallowed by foreign private investors. Yet, Hoggett dismisses these concerns with a nonchalant shrug, asserting that the UK is “already punching above its weight.” Well, Julia, if you say so. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell and Total Plot Move to NYC: Because When You’re Desperate, Anything Sounds Like a Good Idea!

May 9th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 9 May 2024

Alright, folks, gather ’round for a classic tale of “The Grass is Greener in the U.S.,” starring none other than Shell and TotalEnergies, the European oil megastars. In their latest “poor us” saga, they’re eyeing New York like it’s the promised land of stock market valuations. Oh, the excitement!

Now, don’t get too teary-eyed, but Shell’s Chief Executive, Wael Sawan, dropped a little hint on his earnings call that if Europe keeps treating them like the ugly ducklings of the stock market, they might just take their ball and go play in New York by the end of 2025. TotalEnergies’ big boss, Patrick Pouyanné, isn’t sitting quietly either. He’s been tasked by the board to mull over this geographical leap of faith and spill the beans by September. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell and TotalEnergies Eye Greener Pastures: The Big Apple’s Stock Exchange

May 7th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 7 May 2024

Oh, the drama! TotalEnergies and Shell, those titans of the oil industry, are having a little daydream about moving their stock listings to the flashy stages of Wall Street. Why, you ask? Their current market valuations are as deflated as a punctured oil barrel. Boo-hoo.

In a tragic tale of European neglect and American allure, these two energy behemoths are feeling undervalued back home—kind of like ageing movie stars pining for one last blockbuster. TotalEnergies, the belle of France, is so distraught that even Patrick Pouyanné, the CEO, is openly mulling over a move. He confessed in an earnings call, “There was a discussion with the board.” Yes, folks, they’re “seriously looking at it” because, let’s face it, America is where the big-money parties are. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Seafaring Carnival of Fossil Fools: A Masterclass in Eco-Friendly Hypocrisy

May 3rd, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 3 May 2024

In a stunning display of eco-friendly acrobatics, Shell and its cohorts are ramping up offshore drilling in the Gulf of Mexico, reassuring us that it’s all for the noble cause of emitting slightly less greenhouse gases. Apparently, drilling in the ocean is like a diet version of environmental destruction.

The pièce de résistance? A colossal floating platform named Appomattox, proudly owned by Shell, bobbing about 80 miles off Louisiana’s coast like a monument to human hubris. It’s a real-life version of “Waterworld,” minus Kevin Costner’s rugged charm. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell: Masters of Environmental Destruction, Not So Keen on New York Relisting Right Now

May 2nd, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted 2 May 2024 by John Donovan

In a stunning display of corporate benevolence, Shell’s CEO Wael Sawan announced that the oil behemoth is graciously not considering relisting in New York at the moment. How thoughtful! Instead, they’re laser-focused on buying back shares, because apparently, that’s what the world needs more of—Shell shares.

Sawan, in a call with analysts, outlined Shell’s noble mission to bridge the valuation gap with its U.S. rivals. Because, you know, when you’re already swimming in oil money, why not aim for even more obscene profits? “We will always have something like a listing or other elements under review,” Sawan remarked, as if to say, “We’re always on the lookout for new ways to exploit the planet.”

And just in case you were wondering, Shell’s shares are currently trading below “fair market value,” according to Sawan. Well, gosh darn it, we can’t have that, can we? Because when you’re a ruthless polluter, it’s crucial that your stock price reflects your true worth as a destroyer of ecosystems. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

US Lawmakers Roast Oil Titans for Climate Circus: Shell Plays Shell Games While Exxon Pulls a Vanishing Act

Apr 30th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 30 April 2024

Well, grab your popcorn folks, because it’s showtime in the political circus! Democratic lawmakers in the US just dropped a bombshell report, and guess who’s in the spotlight? Yep, you guessed it: our favourite fossil fuel fiends, Big Oil.

According to the Democrats’ dossier, oil companies have been twirling their moustaches and cackling maniacally as they pull the wool over everyone’s eyes. It’s like a Shakespearean tragedy but with more oil rigs and fewer tragic heroes. The House Committee on Oversight and Accountability, after nearly three years of sleuthing, finally uncovered the dastardly deeds of Exxon Mobil Corp., Chevron Corp., and our very own Shell Plc, among others.

The report reads like a thriller novel, accusing oil companies of a laundry list of sins. From pretending to support the Paris climate agreement while secretly planning their next fossil fuel fiesta, to hawking gas as a clean energy solution while conveniently ignoring its planet-roasting properties, these guys have truly mastered the art of deception. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell Rakes in $1 Billion Annually from US Crude Trading, Lawsuit Exposes

Apr 29th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 29 April 2024

 The mighty overlords at Shell, the beacon of environmental care and ethical capitalism, have been caught with their hands elbow-deep in the oil barrel yet again. In a jaw-dropping turn of events, a former lackey of the corporate behemoth decided to spill the crude beans in a Texas courtroom. And oh boy, what a gusher of greed it revealed!

According to the holy scrolls of court documents, Shell’s secret stash of greenbacks from its U.S. crude trading operations is enough to make Scrooge McDuck blush.

John Dimech, a once-upon-a-time head honcho in Shell’s oil trading circus, spilled the oily tea during his deposition, admitting that the company’s crude trading division churns out a cool $950 million to $1 billion annually. That’s right, folks, while you’re struggling to fill up your gas tank, Shell is swimming in a sea of black gold.

But wait, there’s more! Not only does Shell rake in more cash than a Vegas casino on a Saturday night, but it also showers its traders with bonuses so hefty they could probably buy a small island nation. Move over, CEOs, because these folks are bringing home the real bacon. Forget your measly millions; we’re talking about bonuses that could rival the GDP of a small country. read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell and Co. Dance to the Tune of Deception: Big Oil’s Big Tobacco Moment

Apr 28th, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 28 April 2024

Welcome to the latest episode of “Guess Who’s Ruining the Planet Today?” Surprise, surprise, it’s none other than the bigwigs of Big Oil, who’ve been keeping up their ‘charming’ tradition of wrecking the environment while lining their pockets with gold.

Enter California’s knight in shining armour, Attorney General Rob Bonta, who’s decided to take on the corporate leviathans like BP, Shell, ExxonMobil, ConocoPhillips, and Chevron, along with their trusty sidekick, the American Petroleum Institute (API). Why? Oh, just for orchestrating a little thing called the climate crisis.

Bonta’s not pulling punches either; he’s slapping them with a 135-page lawsuit, armed with what he calls “smoking gun” evidence. And guess what? He’s not alone in this fight. Dozens of states are lining up to join the fray. read more

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Shell’s Falcon Pipeline: A Symphony of Environmental Disregard Hits Sour Note with Pennsylvania AG

Apr 23rd, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Former employees spilled the beans faster than Shell spills drilling mud. One brave soul, Sean Larson, dared to speak up and got shown the door quicker than you can say “transparency.”

Posted by John Donovan: 23 April 2024

Pennsylvania’s Attorney General has had it up to here with Shell Pipeline Co.’s shenanigans. They’ve been charged not once, not twice, but a whopping 13 times with violating Pennsylvania’s Clean Streams Law. Why? Oh, just for repeatedly treating our precious environment like a trash can during the construction of their precious Falcon Pipeline.

Attorney General Michelle Henry isn’t mincing her words, folks. She’s dropping those charges faster than you can say “environmental catastrophe.” Shell apparently had a grand old time “forgetting” to mention all those pesky spills of industrial waste during their little construction project. You know, just your typical “whoopsie daisy” moments where drilling mud—yeah, the stuff they use to keep things slippery—somehow found its way into streams and wetlands. But hey, who cares about wetlands, right? read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.

Shell’s Desperate Dash to Ditch London: An Epic Solution to Their Share Woes?

Apr 21st, 2024
by John Donovan.
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Posted by John Donovan: 21 April 2024

In a move that screams “What the hell are we even doing anymore?”, Shell, the grand poobah of the London Stock Exchange, is flirting with the idea of dumping the UK for a shot at American glory. But will this desperate shuffle truly be the panacea for their valuation nightmares? Spoiler alert: probably not.

Former Shell bigwig Ben van Beurden seems to think so, eloquently describing London’s valuation of Shell as being on par with a discount bin at a dollar store. Current head honcho Wael Sawan chimes in, echoing the sentiment with all the finesse of a bull in a china shop, claiming they’ve got “a location that clearly seems to be undervalued” and they’re ready to roll the dice on “all options. All options.” read more

This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.
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