Ah, Shell. The oil giant with a legacy so toxic it makes Chernobyl look like a botanical garden. After a century of globe-spanning environmental destruction, supporting genocidal regimes, and oh yeah, using its own employees as guinea pigs for carcinogenic experiments, they’ve now decided to sell their 37.5% stake in a German refinery. This stake, mind you, was part of the Schwedt refinery, a cozy little operation that supplies 90% of Berlin’s fuel needs. But don’t worry, Berliners, I’m sure there are totally safe alternatives out there. Maybe you could ride to work on the backs of all the displaced polar bears Shell has left homeless over the decades.
But this isn’t your typical fire sale. Oh no. This one comes with the added drama of a legal challenge from Rosneft, Russia’s very own oil-stained conglomerate. Rosneft, which used to control a 54% stake in the Schwedt refinery until Germany got a little antsy after Putin’s Ukrainian vacation, thinks it should have first dibs on the sale. Because what’s better than watching two villains duke it out over who gets to profit from decades of environmental terrorism?
According to the Higher Regional Court of Duesseldorf, Rosneft’s legal tantrum probably won’t amount to much. Anne Frister of the court was quoted saying, “We see little chance of success for the complaint,” which is legal speak for, “Rosneft, sit down and shut up.”
Let’s not forget that Shell is notorious for having its own sinister in-house spy firm, Hakluyt, which spends its time plotting against anyone who dares to question the purity of their oil-soaked empire. Greenpeace? Hakluyt’s probably watching your every move right now. If you’ve ever looked disapprovingly at a Shell logo, don’t worry—you’re probably on a list too.
And let’s talk about Shell’s oh-so-ethical investors. Take the Qatar Investment Authority (QIA), for instance. This “moral” institution not only owns a hefty stake in Shell but also holds 19% of Rosneft. So while Qatar postures as if it’s preparing to ride in and clean up the mess in Germany, let’s not pretend it isn’t just another billionaire-backed vulture circling the remains of a once-great industry.
Meanwhile, there’s John Donovan, owner of the brilliantly unapologetic royaldutchshellplc.com, who appears to be Shell’s personal thorn-in-the-side. Somehow, Donovan has managed to critique Shell’s monstrous behavior for years without ever being dragged into court. You know why? Because telling the truth isn’t defamatory—at least, not yet.
This website and sisters royaldutchshellgroup.com, shellnazihistory.com, royaldutchshell.website, johndonovan.website, and shellnews.net, are owned by John Donovan. There is also a Wikipedia segment.
EBOOK TITLE: “SIR HENRI DETERDING AND THE NAZI HISTORY OF ROYAL DUTCH SHELL” – AVAILABLE ON AMAZON
EBOOK TITLE: “JOHN DONOVAN, SHELL’S NIGHTMARE: MY EPIC FEUD WITH THE UNSCRUPULOUS OIL GIANT ROYAL DUTCH SHELL” – AVAILABLE ON AMAZON.
EBOOK TITLE: “TOXIC FACTS ABOUT SHELL REMOVED FROM WIKIPEDIA: HOW SHELL BECAME THE MOST HATED BRAND IN THE WORLD” – AVAILABLE ON AMAZON.
